Outside The Wall
by gidgetgal9
Summary: S6 spoilers.  Dean knew that Sam's wall wasn't stable but when a demon 'cracks' it, he isn't prepared to deal with the fall out.  Beta'd by Floralia and Sendintheclowns.
1. Chapter 1

Outside The Wall

Summary-S6 spoilers. Dean knew that Sam's wall wasn't stable but when a demon 'cracks' it, he isn't prepared to deal with the fall out. Beta'd by Floralia and Sendintheclowns.

A/N: I started this story right after _Unforgiven_ but real life got in the way and I had to put it on the back burner. In the end I think I got a bit Kripked, but I feel like I still took a different path. A big thanks to my awesome betas.

_Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy  
>Banging your heart against some mad bugger's wall. <em>

_From Pink Floyd's Outside The Wall_

Sam felt the demon's breath on him as she held his neck in a crushing grip. He could see Dean lying prone on the floor, conscious but disoriented from his flight across the room. _They were so screwed._

The female demon looked a lot like Ruby, and that had proved to be just enough distraction to let her get the upper hand.

She leaned into his ear, her hot breath making him shiver as she spoke. "I could crush you and your brother right now, but what fun is there in that? No, I think I know of something that would prove to be sweet revenge for my fallen brethren. Have you ever heard the phrase, walls are made to be broken?"

Sam sucked in a startled breath. "No."

The demon laughed wickedly "Oh yeah, let's see. I think I know a Latin phrase that could do the trick if I add this."

The she-demon produced a vial from her back pocket and pushed the cork off using her thumb. Sam scrambled and tried to move away but she was too strong. Soon her fingers were pushing his mouth open as she emptied the sweet tasting liquid in his mouth. He was shocked when it fizzled on his tongue and evaporated, not allowing him to spit it out.

The demon looked at him in triumph as she spoke. "Foris parietis vos reperio vernum."

The words and meaning echoed in Sam's head. _Outside the wall you find the truth._

He was unable to process what was happening as a blinding pain shot through his head. Before he could catch his breath he found himself surrounded in darkness.

-0-

Dean was in bad shape; his right shoulder was dislocated and there was a loud buzzing in his ears all thanks to the demon bitch that now had his brother trapped against the wall. Her tiny hands crushing Sam's neck.

It amazed him how many times Sam had found himself in that position. It was like his neck had a target sign painted on it. Dean hoped that Sam still had the demon killing Ginsu knife but no luck, he finally spotted it about two feet from where he lay.

He knew the bitch was whispering terrifying nonsense in his brother's ear from the look on Sam's face, but there was little Dean could do but use the distraction so that he could get the knife to end the bitch.

It was slow going but Dean finally had the knife in his hand and stood to use it when he watched his brother sag and slide down the wall. In a fury of anger he charged the demon but wasn't fast enough.

The demon smiled as she exited the battered lost body of the woman she had been riding. The meat suit made a sickening sound as it hit the floor. Dean could see the broken neck as he stepped over the body to get to Sam.

Dean raised his uninjured arm to find Sam's pulse and was thrilled when he found it. It was a bit fast but there. Sam's breathing was a somewhat ragged but he was essentially okay, well, okay for a Winchester on a hunt.

Dean lightly tapped on Sam's cheek, willing him to open his eyes. He was rewarded with a slow blinking as Sam slowly came back online.

"Dean?" Sam slurred the words out.

"Yeah, right here Sam." Dean gave him a reassuring smile.

"Miss me?" Sam moved his brother's hand from him and staggered to his feet.

Dean caught himself against the wall as the unexpected rebuff upset his balance. He winced as his shoulder was jarred. Part of him wanted to be angry but he knew that Sam was probably suffering from a scrambled brain due to a concussion so instead he gingerly stood trying to assess his injured brother.

Sam scowled under the examination. "Dude, stare much?"

Dean sighed; it was going to be a long night he could just tell. "Sam you okay? Did that demon scramble your brain?"

Sam chuckled. "Oh she did more than that. You don't get it do you?"

Dean felt his heart skip a beat as he responded. "What am I not getting?"

"Robotic is back. Like I said, did you miss me?" Sam was now full out smirking.

A cold chill crept up Dean's spine. _No it couldn't be. Sam had his soul back, damn it._

"Did she take your soul?" Dean asked hesitantly.

"Did she take your soul?" Sam parroted back. "No Einstein, she cracked the wall."

Dean let out a breath, slightly relieved but still unsure of what was going on.

"So why are you back?" Dean asked tentatively, afraid of the answer.

"To save your Sammy from becoming a sobbing insane mess. I mean, if I wasn't here right now? Let's just say you wouldn't like what you'd be witnessing. When you re-souled me, against my will, I might add, I didn't disappear. I just went into hiding because I knew that Sam would need me. I knew you would blow it. And boy did you ever blow it! So you should be on your knees thanking me for the help." Sam moved forward and Dean found himself backing away.

Sam just stopped and shook his head. "Dude if I wanted to hurt you, then I wouldn't have played my hand. I would have let you believe I was your Sammy and then Bam!"

Dean flinched at the loud words and menacing tone. He was really wishing that this Sam would leave.

"Then what are you up to?" Dean mumbled out, not sure what to do.

"I was gonna fix your shoulder so we could get out of here before one of her friends shows up." Sam replied moving forward again.

Dean reluctantly let his 'brother' push the dislocated shoulder back in place. In an uneasy silence, they gathered their supplies and headed back to the car. It was a silent car ride back to the motel. Dean wasn't sure what to say to Sam, and well, Sam seemed content to smirk at him.

Dean let Robo Sam into the motel room he had booked just hours earlier with his Sam. It felt all kinds of wrong but Dean knew he needed to pull himself together. He needed to figure out what was going on.

Dean sat down on his bed and motioned for Sam to do the same. Sam sighed but complied.

"Sam, could you answer some questions? I'm still not clear on what happened back at the warehouse."

Robo Sam rolled his eyes. "You really are dense sometimes. That demon bitch, she cracked the wall."

Dean swallowed hard, dreading to ask more. "The wall that Death created?"

"What other wall would I be talking about? Geesh, how does he put up with you? So, yeah she forced some sweet tasting crap down his throat, used a Latin phrase that roughly translates to something like, 'outside the wall you find the truth'_, _the dam broke and I rushed to the rescue before Sam – your Sam- was a drooling vegetable." Sam finished and stood, pacing.

Dean sat quietly trying to process everything the other Sam had told him. He guessed it might make sense after everything that had happened to his little brother, his personality might have fragmented into to two people.

"Don't worry, we'll figure this out, Sam." Dean replied still stunned by the news.

"No you don't get it. The deed is done, the cat is out of the bag. Maybe I need to paint you a picture, one that you can understand." Sam paused and snapped his fingers on his right hand. "I got it. I know just what to do. I'll give you the Sam you want, the one you really miss. Your favorite Sam. That way you'll get it and I'll get away from you. I tired of your stupid ass anyway."

Dean frowned in concern, not sure what to do. Sam was talking crazy and he was far from prepared to deal with it.

"Sam, just calm down," Dean said sternly, hoping to get this Sam to listen.

"Oh, I am calm."

Sam moved back to the bed and lay down, closing his eyes. A moment later he opened them with a gasp. Dean watched as his younger sibling slowly sat up, looking confused. Sam gently probed his throat and winced.

"Dean, what happened?" Sam asked quietly.

Dean took a calming breath before replying. "What do you remember?"

He knew that poking at memories after what the other Sam had shared probably wasn't a good idea but he wasn't sure how to proceed.

Sam swallowed hard and winced. "Uh, Dad wanted to hunt a pack of black dogs over spring break with some other hunter and he got us a cabin to stay in. This doesn't look like the cabin Dean, what am I not remembering?"

Dean tried to quell the panic that was threatening to over take him. Robo Sam had said he was going to give him his favorite Sam and now here he was face to face with a brother that had the memories of his fourteen year old self. That Sam was a great little brother, so helpful and still looked up to Dean and their dad even if he didn't share their love of hunting.

"Sam, there was more than black dogs in the woods and you ended up face to face with a werewolf. You took a pretty good beating and so Dad had me bring you to town so you could rest up."

Sam looked thoughtful for a moment and replied softly. "I got a concussion?"

Dean gave him a grateful smile, he was so happy that Sam was buying his story. "Yeah kiddo. So uh, it is kind of late are you hungry?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah but I don't think I could do pizza with my sore throat. Maybe some Chinese if there is a place here in town?"

Dean stood thankful to have something to do, something to concentrate on. He needed to help his brother but for now he would be content to provide for his basic needs. Once Sam was asleep he could work on the other problem.

Dinner was all kind of odd, with Sam peppering Dean with questions about their past life. It seemed like a thousand life times ago and so it was hard to answer. That and the emotions the past drug up made it hard to take.

When he wasn't being questioned by his geek boy little brother, Dean tried to quell the questions he had himself. Was Robo Sam telling the truth? Was the fact the wall cracked the reason for Sam's multiple personalities making an appearance?

The one thing that he was thankful for was the fact that the Sam he was stuck with right now, didn't seem to notice that he was a lot older than the 18 year old Dean he should be sharing a room with and he didn't seem to notice that he, himself had become a Sasquatch. It was like the kid was looking at the world through rose colored glasses and all was well. This made handling things a lot easier.

A full on delusional Sam did have some perks.

It was after two before Sam finally settled down and went to sleep. A sleeping Sam was something Dean was very grateful for, he had been worried that he might have to face another sleepless version.

-0-

Dean tried to get Castiel's attention and when that failed he called Bobby.

"So you're telling me that a demon cracked Sam's wall and now you are dealing with multiple personalities?"

Dean sighed. "Yeah."

Bobby answered Dean's sigh with one of his own. "So are we talking Sybil territory?"

"Don't know Bobby, so far there has only been two but who knows how many will appear."

"Damn it to Hell." Bobby huffed out. "Sam needs professional help. But how do you get that for a hunter?"

"Damned if I know. What I do know is that this has to be fixable, the kid has been through too much for it to end with him talking to himself in a corner somewhere." Dean could feel the anger building up in him at the thought of his brother suffering.

"Calm down boy. You'll do Sam no good losing your cool. I will work on my end of things to see if we can find a way to patch the wall. I'll also ask around to see if there is such a thing as a Supernatural Head Doctor. In the meantime, just humor Sam, whichever one appears and don't let him out of your sight even if Robo Sam pushes buttons."

Dean huffed a frustrated laugh. "That damn bastard might kill me in my sleep."

"No, he won't because he has a soul now. I think the Robo Sam you are dealing with now is just a defense mechanism. Sam's psyche has memories of how bad ass this part of him was. How that Sam was able to be strong no matter what the circumstances so it makes sense he would use him. Just try and be patient no matter what the kid throws your way."

"As long as he doesn't regress to a baby, we'll be alright. I'm not doing his diapers." Dean smarted off, feeling a bit better after talking to the older hunter.

It made him feel less alone and gave him hope to have Bobby working on fixing things.

"I hear ya there, boy. Don't even want to picture that one. So, I'll do what I can on my end and I'll be in touch."

"I'll watch the kid and continue to try and summon Angel Boy. Hopefully we'll get a handle on this soon."

"We will." Bobby replied in a sympathetic voice.

"Yeah." Dean replied quietly as he snapped the phone closed.

Dean moved out of the bathroom where he had hid to call his friend. As he opened the bathroom door, light bathed his younger brother asleep in bed. Sam looked so peaceful, so young; it made Dean's heart ache knowing that just under the surface his brother was battling Hell's memories.

It made Dean determined to save his brother – to save him from himself.

-0-

Dean had been reluctant to lie down but he was bone tired and he knew he needed to rest so that he would be able to look after Sam when he awoke. He really hadn't meant to fall asleep but he knew he had blown it when he awoke from a restless slumber to the sound of clicking on the laptop.

Dean slowly sat up in bed and spied his brother sitting at the small table in their motel room, his head buried in the laptop. Not wanting to spook his brother Dean cleared his throat and that pulled his brother's attention from the computer.

"Dean, hope I didn't wake you?" Sam had a concerned, earnest look and it made Dean want to think last night had been a dream, but he knew he was never that lucky.

"Nah, I'm good, how about you?" Dean hoped that he wouldn't have to ask many questions to figure out which Sam he was talking too. He figured stressing the kid out was not a good idea.

Sam shrugged. "Throats still sore but I guess that is to be expected. The shape shifter really did a number on it. But it is worth it to know that Zach is free and Becky is safe. I'm sorry about the murder rap dude, that is gonna make life hard."

Dean nodded, trying to come across as unconcerned while his insides were screaming _Danger, Danger, Will Robinson_. He was now faced with another 'Sam', this one post Jess's death Sam. Not the most stable Sam, but he'd he take him over Robo Sam anytime.

"So Sammy, what you researching?" Dean asked as he stood and stretched.

"It's Sam. I was checking leads on Dad and when that dead ended for the millionth time, I started looking for a hunt. I would have gotten breakfast but you seemed restless so I figured me taking a shower or grabbing grub might wake you."

Dean's heart broke a little remembering this time with Sam. A Sam so intent on finding Dad and Jess's killer. If they had only known the road they were on... Dean shook that thought away.

Dean said a little thank you to whoever was listening that his brother hadn't ventured out alone and decided it was time to nix this Sam's quest for a hunt. A hunt right now would be suicidal with his ever changing brother.

"Yeah, I couldn't get comfortable last night, I think I might be coming down with something and I'm pretty damn sore from my tango with my double." Dean made a loud wince as he popped his back.

At least he wasn't lying about the soreness. The demon bitch had done a number on him.

Sam studied him with a furrowed brow. "You sure you're okay?"

"Just peachy, but how upset would you be if we at least took a 24 hour break?" Dean held his breath hoping his brother would take the bait.

Sam blew out a slow breath. "I really want to find Dad and our hunts have just been distractions so I have nothing against taking a short break. It will give me time to run a few more leads."

Dean nodded his thanks. "Yeah, well I think I'll grab some grub, I'm starving. Why don't you get a shower?"

"Yeah okay. Just coffee and a soft pastry for me, I don't think I could get anything else down."

Dean nodded. "Sure thing, Francis."

Sam rolled his eyes as he stood from the table moving to grab his duffle bag. Dean patted himself on the back for being able to pull an old nickname from that time period. It was good to ruffle this Sam's feathers because even with the terrible loss of Jess, this was a Sam that still had hope of a normal life.

Dean grabbed his keys and wallet off the nightstand and reluctantly left his little brother to gather food. The next few days were going to be full of babysitting and he hoped his nerves were up for the task.

TBC

A/N: I have the whole story written and I'm just in the process of cleaning it up. I hope to post a chapter or two each week.

I also thought I'd point out a few things that threw one of my beta's. Ginsu knives are something that is advertised a lot during late night TV here in the states so I thought Dean might use that term. _Sybil _is the name of a movie made in 1976, that featured Sally Field, playing a character with multiple personalities.

Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Outside The Wall

A/N: A little warning here. With Sam channeling his soulless persona, there will be some rude and crude remarks in this chapter. Robo Sam has no problem pushing buttons and saying things to make people squirm.

Chapter Two

Dean had picked up some breakfast quickly, not wanting to leave his brother alone for long. Once he pulled up to the motel room, he tried reaching out to Castiel one more time. To his surprise he was greeted by the trench coat wearing angel who appeared beside him in the Impala. Dean jumped and cursed but was very happy to see him.

"Dean, I am very busy, things are not good..."

"Cas, dude, I get it and I would not be calling on you if this wasn't important but some demon chick cracked the Great Wall of Sam." Dean paused and waited for Cas to respond.

"I'm sorry Dean, but I warned you. I'm not sure I can help." Cas replied solemnly.

"The thing is he's not incapacitated like we thought. Instead he is showing signs of multiple personalities that are protecting him from ..."

"From total collapse? That is interesting. So, I am happy he is coping but what do you want from me, Dean?" Cas stared at Dean intently.

"I need someone to fix the wall. To fix Sam." Dean spoke the words with deep emotion, a plea.

"I don't..."

"Please Cas, just look at him. I don't know where else to turn." Dean placed a hand on Castiel's shoulder willing the angel to stay.

"Okay, I will take a look Dean." With that Castiel was gone.

Dean cursed, and hurried into the motel room, not sure which Sam was there but certain he was freaking out by the appearance of the angel.

He was right, Sam was moving towards his duffel full of weapons on top of his bed shouting at Castiel as Dean entered the room.

"Whoa Sam, it's okay, he's angel." Dean smiled at the disbelief in Sam's eyes; it was a mix of mistrust and awe.

"B-But you said... angels aren't real. I don't understand, Dean." Sam gave Dean his patented lost puppy look and Dean wanted to give the kid a hug but instead gave him a sympathetic smile.

"Sam, some things happened while we weren't hunting together and it's far too complicated to get into right now. I have reason to believe that a demon has messed with your head a bit and Castiel might be able to tell. Just trust me."

Sam moved his left hand through his hair in a nervous gesture. "I trust you, Dean, but this is a lot to take in."

Castiel moved forward, hands out in a placating manner. "Sam, if you could sit down on the bed, this won't take but a moment. I promise."

Sam nodded and sat down on the bed in front of him, not taking his eyes off the angel. But before Cas could reach Sam, the young hunter's eyes rolled in the back of his head and he slumped down on the bed.

Dean moved quickly to his brother's side, feeling for a pulse, it was a bit fast but there. "Cas I think the stress caused him to pass out."

Castiel nodded and moved closer. "I can examine him unconscious. I just need to touch his head."

Dean tensed. "Will it hurt him?"

Cas shook his head. "No, it is not like touching his soul, I just need to peer at the wall."

"Okay." Dean moved back and gave Castiel some room.

Castiel placed his right hand finger tips against Sam's forehead. "The wall is pretty secure – there is only a small breach but it's enough to cause Sam stress."

As Castiel pulled his hand back, Sam's eyes opened wide and he gasped for breath. Dean stared, waiting to see which Sam had joined them and was not pleased when Sam gave him a knowing smirk. Robo Sam was back, _damn it._

"Well, looky here, Castiel, you're back." Sam sat up slowly and stared the angel down.

Castiel shifted with unease under the gaze. "I was checking on the wall."

Sam licked his lips seductively. "You like to touch me don't you, Cas? You like to put your hands inside me and feel me. I like it too, I like to feel owned and invaded by someone so powerful. It's an adrenaline rush. Wanna be inside me, Cas?"

Dean watched as Castiel swallowed hard and took a step back, grabbing Dean, and pulling him with him. Castiel didn't stop until they were across the room.

Castiel spoke in a low voice with his eyes averted from the younger Winchester in the room. "Dean, you need to take Sam somewhere safe. He is vulnerable in this state and any attack by a supernatural being could be his undoing. That wall is cracked and unstable. It would not take much for it to crumble to the ground and then Sam would be lost. I don't know what to do for him but I will search all my resources. In the meantime you need to hide Sam away."

Dean nodded. "Bobby's house? The elder hunter is still getting over the hurt of Robo Sam trying to kill him but I'm sure he would take us in if we're in danger."

Castiel sighed. "Yes, as much as I hate to say this, locking Sam up in the panic room might be the best thing for now."

Sam rose from his bed in the corner smirking. "Oh Castiel are you telling Dean all your little dirty secrets. You can tell me, I'd love to make them all come true."

Dean turned towards his brother. "Sam just shut up we need..."

Before Dean could finish his sentence Castiel had moved quickly towards his smug sibling and with a quick touch had Sam out for the count on his bed.

"Do you think that was necessary?" Dean huffed out.

"It made me feel better, he was getting annoying." Castiel huffed back.

Dean swiped at his face. "Yeah well, if he is going to stay as **that **Sam I would like to gag him. So, should I load him up in the car ..."

"No, we can't risk his safety. I will transport the two of you and your car to Bobby's house." Castiel was now moving towards Dean.

"Just great, don't forget our bags." Dean grunted out and then found himself inside the panic room with Sam on the cot.

Dean just caught his breath when he heard a curse and then Bobby's footsteps as he moved downstairs towards the panic room, his voice raised in anger.

"Boys are you down there? Cause your car just appeared outside in my front yard and I about peed myself. A little warning next time would be nice."

"Sorry Bobby." Dean yelled back just as the older hunter entered the room.

"Sorry huh? What the hell, Dean?" Bobby stood in the door way and Dean could tell he was having trouble catching his breath.

"Castiel thought Sam needed to be here in order to be safe. He said a demon or other supernatural creature could easily break Sam in his current state." Dean paused and let his friend take all of it in.

Bobby took off his ball cap and scratched the back of his head before putting it back on. "Makes sense.

But this room isn't going to give the kid a great sense of security."

"No, but I'll stay with him. It'll be okay." Dean replied with more confidence than he actually felt.

Bobby was about to answer when Sam started to stir on the cot. The kid slowly sat up wiping the sleep from his eyes. Dean held his breath waiting to see which Sam was with them now. Bobby seemed just as curious.

Sam's eyes went wide as he looked around the room. "D-Dean, Uncle Bobby where are we?"

The use of Uncle Bobby immediately pointed to the fourteen year old version of Sam and while that made Dean feel better he could see Bobby shifting uncomfortably under the kid's gaze.

Dean moved forward and sat next to Sam on the cot. "What do you remember, Sam?"

"We were at a motel room, I was healing up from a hunt I was fuzzy on because of a concussion. That was last night but... what happened Dean and how did Uncle Bobby get here?" Sam was looking from Dean to Bobby with fear in his eyes.

Bobby cleared his throat and spoke up. "Sam, something is after you and it attacked again last night. You were knocked unconscious and Dean drove all night and brought you to my house."

Sam took in a stuttering breath. "What's after me? Dean..."

Dean decided to go along with Bobby's made up story because there was no way he was going to tell his brother that he was losing his mind because a wall was breaking in his head.

"A demon, Sam. Dad is trying to find out more about it but in the meantime we need to stay here where it's safe." Dean replied in a soothing tone, willing his brother to accept their hiding away at Bobby's house.

Sam had moisture collecting in his eyes but tears didn't fall; instead he nodded his head forcefully before replying, "But this doesn't look like Bobby's house."

Bobby chuckled. "I've been doing some remodeling. We're in the basement Sam, and this is a panic room built to keep out all the supernatural baddies."

Sam gave the elder hunter a smile. "It's made of iron?"

"Yep and salt. Dean can tell you all about it. How about I go upstairs and make you boys some breakfast?"

Dean gave Bobby a big smile hoping that the older hunter understood how much he appreciated the support. "Yeah, breakfast sounds awesome. I'm starving."

Sam snorted. "You're always starving."

Bobby laughed and shook his head as he headed out of the room.

-0-

Bobby had started making toast for breakfast when his cell phone rang.

"Singer here."

"Bobby Singer?" A very sultry female voice replied.

"That would be me, who do I have the pleasure of talking to?" Bobby tried to keep the curiosity out of his voice.

"My name is Doctor Clara Moore. I heard through the grape vine that you were looking for and I quote 'a supernatural head doctor'?"

Bobby could hear the amusement in the doctor's voice. He chuckled. "Yeah well, my friend does have a unique problem."

"I see, well Rufus is an old friend of my dad's. My dad trades in unique items if you get my drift."

"Yes ma'am, I think I do. So you've heard your fair share of the unusual?"

"Let's just say if I have a patient that's diagnosed as schizophrenic I tend to use the word Christo on our first visit, and then a call to a priest is sometimes in order. I practice a type of medicine that is a little unorthodox but I have a high rate of success."

Bobby snorted in amusement. "I bet you do."

"So I have a clinic in Lincoln, Nebraska and I would be happy to have a listen to your unique problem. I've done some discoveries in the medical journals with this sort of thing."

"That would be fine and dandy but you see the person that has this problem can't travel because he's in danger from the supernatural beings running around." Bobby hoped that maybe some sort of help could come over the phone.

"I see. Well maybe you could give me a hypothetical scenario and I might be able to make some suggestions."

"Well, we have a young man, in his late twenties who's mind thinks it was in hell for – oh about a year and a half. More than a year of the time, he believes his soul was in hell being tortured by Lucifer and the Arch Angel Michael, while his soulless body was wrecking havoc hunting supernatural creatures on earth. That came to an end recently when he got his soul back and a wall was built to keep the memories of hell and his time as a soulless being at bay. A few days ago he was hunting a demon when it put a crack in the wall and now the young man is suffering from multiple personalities Ala Sybil."

Bobby paused half expecting a click noting an end to the call. It was a lot to take in even for someone familiar with the world of the supernatural.

Instead he heard a long low whistle on the other end of the phone. "Wow, just wow. Okay, I knew that Rufus had told me that the whole supernatural world had gone crazy and that was why I was seeing an upswing in patients but this has to be the wildest thing I've ever heard of or even thought about."

"Yeah well this kid and his family were always over achievers. So I'm assuming that since you've never dealt with this sort of thing – you don't have any sage words of advice." Bobby replied dryly.

"I don't have any words of advice but I have some questions. How many personalities? And are they different genders – different ages? Do you have specifics?"

Bobby could hear the curiosity in her tone and he couldn't blame her. This had to reel someone that dealt with this sort of thing in. "Well he's still the same guy just splintered. We have a fourteen year old version, a twenty-two year old version and the soulless version which is the weirdest considering that he has his soul back or you know thinks he does. However you want to view that."

"So this so called crack in the wall was too much to take so he literally cracked himself." Clara mumbled out.

"That your professional opinion?" Bobby gruffed out. It was hard to believe she was being so flippant but then again it was crazy talk.

"No, I was just thinking that he cracked into different parts of his own personality to protect himself from dealing with his new reality. This is very interesting and I would like to meet him."

"I'm sure you would but like I said he isn't able to leave the protection of the place he is staying at. So maybe if you could think on it and call me back." Bobby was ready to be done with the whole thing. It was beginning to feel like a waste of time.

"Wait, what if I came to him? I mean, this would be beneficial to both of us. It would give me more research in this sort of area should it ever crop up again and I might be able to help him cope."

"Yeah, well, it ain't that easy. I don't know you and just because you know Rufus doesn't mean I trust you. Plus, the kid has a brother, and he would have to okay all this. So why don't you let me talk this over with Rufus, and the brother, and I'll give you a call back."

Bobby heard the doctor sigh loudly before replying. "You're wasting valuable time but if it has to be this way then... please hurry. Every minute that I'm not there means a minute lost that I could be helping him."

"I'll be in touch." Bobby clicked the phone off. He had mixed feelings about this whole thing but knew that it really didn't matter what he thought. Dean would be the one to make the final call.

-0-

Dean had been happy that Bobby suggested he fill the kid in on the panic room, it gave him something to do while he waited for Bobby to reappear. It was weird hanging out with a mentally de-aged version of his brother but having something to talk about made it easier.

Sam was a bit quiet but very interested in all the details that pertained to the panic room. He was at least still his geeky self. They had just lulled into a bit of quiet when Bobby appeared with a tray full of food.

Sam stared at the older man. "Are we eating down here?"

Bobby nodded. "Safer kid. Just for now, okay?"

Sam sighed and nodded as Bobby moved to set the tray down on the table in the middle of the room. Sam pulled out a chair and sat down and Dean started to join him.

Bobby grabbed his arm halting his movement. "Dean I need help bringing down the coffee and uh, Sam do you want any juice or milk?"

Sam stared at him for a minute before quietly answering. "Milk, please."

Bobby nodded. "Okay, I'll get it. We'll be right back."

Sam stared at Dean with an uneasy expression. "Dean..."

Dean placed a hand on the kid's right shoulder and squeezed. "It'll just take a moment. Why don't you start without me and I'll be back in a minute."

Sam seemed to relax a bit after being reassured and nodded. "Okay."

Dean gave him a quick smile and followed Bobby up the stairs. "So is there a reason for me leaving Sam?"

Bobby sighed. "Yeah, I found a head doctor. Rufus knows this lady doctor in Lincoln and she has helped out quite a few hunters work through trauma in the past. I won't sugar coat it, she does this work because she is fascinated by how the supernatural affects the human psyche but she is supposed to be good."

Dean stayed quiet until they reached the kitchen trying to process what he had been told. Bobby grabbed three mugs down from the cabinets and turned to Dean with a questioning look.

"So what do you think, Dean?"

"I don't know what to think. Have you talked to her?" Dean replied as moved to the fridge to grab the half gallon of milk.

"I did briefly. I checked her out with Rufus and then called her back to see what she was willing to do. She seemed interested and willing to take off from her practice for up to two weeks. In exchange, she would like to be able to write about her experiences with Sam. But with patient confidentiality she wouldn't use his name, or anything like that, it would just be for research purposes only. At least that's the type of deal she has set up before with Rufus's friends. She is interested because she called Rufus before I could to check on her."

Dean took two of the mugs that Bobby held out for him as the elder hunter grabbed the pot of coffee.

"I want to say no Bobby, but hell I don't know what to do. If I do bring her in what do I tell Sam?"

Bobby shook his head. "Hell if I know, but I get how you feel. We're grasping at straws here. My thought is we try it and kick her to the curb the minute this goes south."

"Yeah, well, give her a call. I think it is worth a try." Dean reluctantly replied as they headed back down the stairs.

Dean had hope that Castiel would find away but it never hurt to have a backup plan even if it was a crappy one.

TBC

A/N: Thanks for reading! I hope to have another chapter up as soon as possible.


	3. Chapter 3

Outside The Wall

Chapter Three

Sam had stayed his fourteen year old self for the last few days. Dean could only guess that this particular version could deal with the panic room better than the others.

On the plus side, the de-aged version of his brother had wormed himself back into Bobby's good graces. It was hard for the older man to still see Robo Sam when the innocence of the fourteen year old Sammy was shining through. Dean just hoped that Bobby would be able to cope when the soulless version reared its ugly head. Hell,he hoped he could cope.

Clara had called a few hours earlier to let them know she would be there afternoon. That left Dean with just two hours to talk to his brother before she arrived. Dean was dreading having a conversation with him about it.

They had been playing cards and Dean had lost a second hand in a row to Sam when his brother spoke up.

"Dean is something bothering you? I'm kicking your ass and you're not even grumbling." Sam stared at him with concern.

"I have something I need to talk to you about. And..."

"Is it about the demon? You haven't told me much about that."

How sick was it that Dean wished this was just about a demon hunting Sam?

"Sam, Bobby and I haven't told you the truth about the demon. I was trying to protect you. You see, there _was _a demon and a hunt that went bad. This demon touched you and scrambled your head."

Sam's eyes went wide. "W-What do you mean Dean?"

"I mean, that the year is 2011. You are not fourteen years old and ..."

"I don't understand. So she made me think..."

"Yeah, I mean, you think you're fourteen but..."

Sam stood up and marched over to a mirror and looked at himself, sighing. "So you see an adult Sam but I see myself at fourteen? I don't get it Dean. This is weird even for us. Is this a demon spell or have I lost my mind?"

Dean got up and grabbed his brother by the hand and led him back to the table they were sitting at. He gently pressed Sam into the seat and moved his own chair next to Sam's, never letting go of his little brother's hand. He could tell that the contact was reassuring to Sam, and hell, it was reassuring to him if he was honest with himself.

"It's more like I said, she scrambled things in your head because this you isn't the only one that has come out to play."

Sam's face scrunched up. "I don't get it, Dean."

Dean took a deep breath and released it, willing himself the strength to continue. "We think you're suffering for a supernatural version of multiple personalities."

Sam looked away, his breathing becoming heavy. The kid was becoming agitated and upset. This had Dean wondering if Robo Sam might pop in but that didn't happen. Instead, his little brother looked up at him with watery eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me this before? I felt like things were disjointed but I thought it was because of my concussion. I'm going crazy, aren't I?" Sam pawed at the moisture threatening to flow from his eyes.

Dean moved closer and squeezed his brother's hand. "We hoped that the effects would disappear with time and Sammy, we didn't know what to do. Bobby was doing research and he couldn't find anything but then we found a psychologist. Dr. Moore is aware of the supernatural world and has treated other hunters. She will be here soon to talk to you."

"A shrink? I don't know, Dean, this is all too much." Sam all but sobbed the words out.

Dean found himself wishing for Robo Sam to make an appearance because watching Sammy break apart like this was killing him. Stealing against his own emotions that were threatening to over take him, Dean pulled Sam into a hug.

"Sammy, it will be okay. She's just going to talk to you, and maybe she can help you, but no matter what, we'll get you help. Kiddo, you can count on that. I've gotcha Sammy, that's a promise."

Sam's emotions let go and he was sobbing as Dean held him. It broke Dean's heart but he tried to stay strong for his younger sibling, gently shushing his brother and giving him words of encouragement. Slowly the young hunter's sobbing subsided and he felt Sam pulling away.

"You okay, Sammy?" Dean asked as he took in his brother's pale washed out face.

"I-I'm scared, but you'll stay with me? If you'll stay with me, I think I can do this." Sam stared at Dean with tear streaked eyes.

"Yeah, I'll stay with you Sammy. We'll figure this out together. I promise."

-0-

Bobby had stayed out of the boys' hair. It was going to be a hard job to tell Sammy the truth and he didn't envy Dean at all. To look that kid in the eyes, eyes that were so full of innocence, and tell him that he was messed up in the head... well, Bobby didn't think even he was tough enough to do that.

Bobby shook his head, this was all so fucked up- no way was it even remotely sane. Hell, he had come to accept Sammy back into the fold. This fourteen year old version that was in a giant's body had quickly wormed his way into the elder hunter's heart.

Teenage Sam had been really close to Bobby. They shared an interest in hunting knowledge and the he was such a sweet kid, you couldn't help but care for him. It had been the adult years when Sam had bucked hunting that moved Bobby to feel closer to Dean.

With Sam now acting like his teenage self, Bobby felt himself reconnecting and letting go of all the fear and anger he had felt towards Robo Sam- the Sam that had tried to kill him. He just hoped that he wouldn't have to face that version of Sam ever again.

Bobby was pulled from his thoughts by a knock at the door. Bobby sighed as he approached the front of his house; he knew it had to be the shrink. _It's Showtime_ he thought.

-0-

Clara Moore wasn't sure what she would find at Bobby Singer's home. She didn't expect a lot considering he was a hunter that had lived alone for years according to Rufus and ran a salvage yard on the side.

In her head she'd pictured Sanford and Son's house with the clutter being more on the supernatural side and she wasn't disappointed. The ball cap wearing Mr. Singer that answered the door even seemed to fit the bill of the world she had created in her head.

The older man was dressed in a plaid shirt and jeans; he looked a little uncomfortable as he opened the door. "Dr. Moore?" He asked hesitantly.

Clara held her hand out. "Yes, but please call me Clara."

Bobby wiped at his right hand on his pants before holding out to take hers. "Bobby."

"So Bobby, can I come in?" Clara asked with an amused smile on her face. She was used to her profession intimidating others.

"Certainly, but since you are familiar with the supernatural, uh Christo." Bobby said in a low voice.

Clara laughed as she entered the house. "Did I pass?"

Bobby grinned, "Well, could I offer you a glass of water before we find the boys?"

Clara nodded. "Holy water in ice would be pleasant."

Bobby snorted and winked as he disappeared in the kitchen letting Clara take in her surroundings. The place was dusty but clean which was a happy surprise. Working in filth was not high on her list of pleasant working conditions, though her curiosity when it came to Sam Winchester would overcome even that.

Bobby soon returned with a glass of ice water. Clara took it with a smile and took a long drink.

"Are we good?" She asked as she handed the glass back.

"Yeah, we're good." Bobby answered as he took the glass back.

"So can I see Sam?" Clara hoped her impatience to see the boy wasn't too obvious.

Bobby looked at his feet. "Well, soon enough. First things first, I want to have you take a seat in my office. His brother Dean wants to have a word with you before you meet Sam."

Clara bit down on her disappointment and nodded. "I can imagine Dean has many questions."

Bobby motioned with his hand for Clara to follow him. "Yeah, and Dean practically raised Sam. He's very protective; in fact, I would wager a bet that you won't find any two brothers that are closer."

Clara followed Bobby into his cluttered 'office' area and took a seat in front of the desk as Bobby moved to take a seat behind the desk. "So you've known them for quite awhile?"

Bobby shifted around at the desk trying to get comfortable. "I've known them since they were kids. Their daddy became a hunter when he lost his wife to a demon. Sam was only six months old and Dean barely four. Those kids never had a childhood and grew up moving from hunt to hunt. To be honest, I'm surprised the boys aren't both locked up in prison or a mental ward. It's a hard life but the one constant those two have always had was each other."

Clara could tell the older hunter cared deeply for the boys by the emotions that skittered briefly across his face as he talked about them. His tone had been matter of fact but his eyes betrayed him.

"I'll keep this all in mind when I talk to both boys." Clara replied kindly.

"Yeah, and I know that you have experienced glimpses of the supernatural world, but I hope that you can keep an open mind to what Dean has to tell you, because if you don't this will all just be a waste of time." Bobby's voice had turned cold. She could tell that she hadn't won any trust as of yet.

"If I wasn't open minded I wouldn't have come. Rufus has shared with me and my father the whole Apocalypse scenario and with the crazy things that have happened over the last few years it makes some sense. I won't lie to you, this is a lot for me to take, but I'm willing treat all of Sam's experiences as real even if I don't totally believe it."

Bobby sighed. "I guess that is all we can ask. If you'll excuse me I'll go and get Dean."

Clara nodded. "I'll wait here."

-0-

Dean had gotten Sam calmed down and they had started a new card game up when he heard Bobby's footsteps on the stairs. Dean watched as Sam tensed up as the door to the panic room opened and revealed the elder hunter.

"Hey boys. Dean, did you have a talk with Sammy?" Bobby gave Sam a sympathetic smile.

Dean nodded. "Yeah, is the doc here?"

Bobby sighed as he entered the room. "She's here and I think she is willing to help us, but I told her that you wanted to talk to her first Dean."

Dean moved to get up from the table and could see Sam's eyes glued to his every move. The kid was looking a bit pale again. Dean knew this was all too much for his little brother- hell; it was too much for him.

"Sammy, I'm gonna talk to her first and then she and I will come down together to talk to you. I promise I won't leave you alone with her. Bobby, can you finish this hand for me?" Dean nodded his head towards his cards.

"Sure, kid." Bobby moved to take Dean's place at the table.

As Dean moved around the table he paused next to Sam, placing his hand on the kids shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "This will all work out just fine Sam, no need to worry."

Sam seemed to relax under his touch and looked up, giving Dean a slight smile before turning his attention to Bobby. "Maybe I can play a real game now; Dean has sucked at this all day."

Dean pulled his hand to his chest in mock hurt. "You wound me Sammy."

Sam snorted. "It's the truth. Go talk to the nice doctor lady and maybe she'll get your head on straight."

Bobby grinned and then joined in. "Sounds like a good plan to me. You go talk to her and I'll keep Sammy here company."

Dean gave Bobby a grateful smile. It was good to have someone that he could trust with his fragile little brother.

_Well, he might not be as fragile as I think with the tongue lashing he just gave me_, Dean thought.

Dean gave them a nod and then headed out the room to face the good doctor.

-0-

Dean had pictured a withered older woman who had seen lots of the world's sad side. What he found in Bobby's office was far from that. The minute he entered the room and she stood up his eyes immediately started appreciating the beauty in front of him.

She was probably in her early thirties and around five foot ten inches, at least in her heels. She wore a tight navy skirt that was long, but hugged all her curves, and a silky white top the showed off her more than ample breasts. The doctor's hair was dark brown and in an attractive swept bun. Her eyes were blue and lively. It hit him hard that she was exactly Sam's type.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Moore but please call me Clara."

Dean mumbled, "I'm Dean."

"Dean, is there a problem?" The doctor asked as she approached him.

Dean realized that he had been standing there staring, but damn it if his mind wasn't really over the fact that this doctor was his brother's type, and if Robo Sam reared his ugly head, it wasn't going to be pretty. The way he had spoken to Cas still made Dean shudder when he thought about it.

"No problem... well sort of, but let's sit down and talk." Dean moved to take a seat behind Bobby's desk and immediately pulled out a whiskey bottle and a shot glass from the side drawer of the desk.

Dean placed the glass on the desk and started to pour. "I need a drink, it's been a long day. You want some?"

Clara gave him a frown. "It's only a little before one in the afternoon Dean. Isn't it a little early?"

Dean shook his head. "Not today it isn't. I just spent the last hour explaining to my little brother that he has multiple personalities and that a shrink is coming to talk to him."

Clara gave him a sympathetic smile. "So you hadn't addressed this with Sam before? Wasn't he suspicious?"

Dean threw back shot of whiskey and relished the burn as it flowed down his throat. "Well, the soul less version... Bobby did fill you in on the different Sams?"

Clara nodded. "Yes over the phone, you spent a six month period with your brother where he, uh, believed he had no soul, or didn't have a soul and that is one of the three personalities you're dealing with."

Clara's tone was kind and not condescending like Dean had expected, so he let her trip over her words when it came to whether this was real or not. He knew from firsthand experience just how crazy this all was to reason with.

"Yeah, so soulless Sam, he knows what's going on. He's the personality that's coping trying to keep it all together. Soulless Sam is trying to keep the memories of Hell from taking my brother down. The one I've been dealing with the last few days is the fourteen year old version who's pretty innocent to the world of hunting. He had only been part of hunting a few years so I had told him he was hurt on a hunt and he believed me."

Clara's face scrunched up in thought. "So how did he take it when you told him the truth?"

Dean swiped a hand across his face in frustration. It was hard to admit he was still lying to his little brother. "I didn't really tell him the total truth. I told him that a demon messed with his head causing the multiple personalities. I mean it was a demon that cracked the wall and caused all this so it was sort of the truth."

"It's okay Dean, you're handling this the best you know how, and to be honest, I don't think there are any right or wrong answers here, it's all new territory so please don't beat yourself up over it. What I'd like to know is how Sam took the news about his multiple personalities."

Dean swallowed hard, wishing for another drink, but he knew that he needed to keep his wits about him over the next few hours. "Well, he did get upset. He was very emotional and I held him for awhile as he cried it out. I think he believes me, it was just a lot to take. Sam is afraid he is going crazy."

Clara had made movements to pull a pad out of the large bag that was propped next to the chair she was sitting in. She pulled out a writing tablet and a pen.

Dean smirked. "Gee doctor, I feel like I should go and lie down on the couch."

Clara smiled and raised an eyebrow at him. "Well, I do think that a session with you would be very interesting but for now let's concentrate on your brother. I just want to take a few notes, if that's okay?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah, but that might make Sammy nervous."

Clara paused in her writing. "Duly noted. I'll just make some notes now about what you and Bobby told me and I'll wait until after my session with Sam to make any other notes."

"Okay. So is there anything else you want to know? Oh, and Bobby said you were staying with us? Are you sure about that after meeting us? I won't take offense if you want to get a hotel room but I bet it would hurt Bobby's feelings. He worked his ass off cleaning up a guest room for you to use." Dean chuckled, it had been funny to see Bobby fussing about having a woman in the house.

"Oh yeah, I'm not going anywhere, at least for now. I have my bags in the car. I can get them later."

"Oh, I'll have Bobby get them while you're talking to Sam. It'll give the old man something to do. This has us all a bit nervous."

Clara nodded. "I don't bite, promise. So do you have any questions for me before I go talk to Sam?"

Dean sighed. "Questions, no, but a few rules and warnings. I promised Sam that I would stay with him, and before you say something about needing to talk to him alone please know this- Sam is dangerous. If he takes on the soulless version of himself, he's a loose cannon and I want to be down there for Sam, but also to guarantee your safety. My brother is a large and well trained hunter and when he takes on this soulless version, he is one scary son-of-a-bitch."

Clara shifted nervously in her chair. "I've handled large out of control patients before."

"Yeah, with drugs and orderlies. So think of me and Bobby as your orderlies and support. I don't want you getting hurt and I feel there is one other thing I need to warn you about. It's why I was staring at you when I first entered..."

"You find me hot?" Clara smirked at him.

Dean smirked back and gave her an appreciative once over. "That you are, but the other thing you are, is my brother's type. He loves him some curvy, brunette action with legs to die for, and at least my geeky version of Sam loves his women to have a brain. Can't say as I blame him but the point is... if he goes into Robo Sam mode..."

Clara sat up straight with a questioning look on her face. "Robo Sam?"

"That's what I call the soulless version, or you know, Dexter. Anyway, so if he goes into that personality, you will have him coming on strong."

"Used to that too. So can I ask you a question? What is the third personality like? You haven't mentioned that one."

"That would be the Sam that got pulled back into hunting due to tragedy. His girlfriend was killed just like our mom, when Sam was twenty two and attending college. He watched her die. Losing his girlfriend brought him back to hunting and that Sam was one full of grief and anger. My brother during that time was teetering between grief and the need for revenge. He was very driven, and I have only seen him briefly so far over the last few days. Robo Sam seems to act like he's the one in control of who appears and he thinks I prefer the younger Sam that followed my rules and my lead, and to some point he's right. It's nice at this moment facing the break in his sanity with a version that will listen to me."

It was hard for Dean to admit he liked being in control of Sam with the wall cracked, but he felt it was an important thing to share. He had expected Clara to be a stick in the mud that was going to judge his every word, but instead he found himself somewhat relaxed in her presence.

"Okay then, I think I have what I need to have a little meeting with Sam. Dean, I don't want you to worry. I'll keep things as light as I can and as unstressful for Sam as I can." Clara started to put away her tablet and pen.

Dean moved to stand so that he could direct her to the panic room. "Oh, don't be freaked out by where we're keeping Sam. It will feel a bit dungeony...

Clara stood and laughed. "Is dungeony a word? Don't worry about it, Bobby told me over the phone about his panic room. Sounds like a wonderful idea- the perfect thing for a hunter to have."

Dean scratched at his head and moved towards the hallway. "Yeah, well, Bobby is pretty proud of it, I just wish we could keep poor Sam out of it. So, shall we?"

Clara smiled and took his arm. "Yeah, let's get this show on the road."

TBC

A/N: I'm so sorry for the late post. My beta's had it to me so I could have it up on Thursday but then real life got in my way. I hope to have the next chapter up by Thursday and to get back on schedule. I wanted to thank everyone who is reading and especially those who have taken time to comment, it is very appreciated. :)


	4. Chapter 4

Outside The Wall

Chapter Four

Clara entered the dark room they called the panic room. Her eyes were immediately glued to the tall man that was slouched down as small as his frame would allow in a wooden chair in front of a card table. Before she entered the room, the young man must have been playing card with Mr. Singer. Now his cards were lying in front of him as he turned his attention to her.

She could see the anxiety and fear written all over the open face in front of her. He gave her a slight smile and shifted in his chair. Clara returned the facial gesture with bright smile and extended her right hand as she approached him.

"Sam, I'm Clara. It's really nice to meet you." Clara was happy when Sam took her hand and gave it a squeeze. His hands were large and totally enveloped Clara's hand.

Sam gave her a nervous smile. "It's nice to meet you."

Clara pulled her hand back and studied the man in front of her. She knew he was in his late twenties and he looked it, but his eyes were those of someone much older. Sam was seated but even so, she could tell he was tall and well built. It gave her a new appreciation for the offer Dean had made to stay with her for safety reasons.

Bobby moved behind her getting up from his seat. "Here, Clara, why don't you take my seat and I'll see about rounding up some grub for lunch."

"Thank you, Bobby, but don't knock yourself out. I like peanut butter and jelly just fine." Clara replied as she took her seat.

Bobby gave her a relieved smile. "My kind of woman. So is there anything else you might need..."

Before Bobby could finish Dean moved forward with another chair in hand. "She has bags in her car that need to be brought in, if you don't mind. I'm gonna stay here with Sammy."

"Sure thing, and if you guys need anything else just holler." Bobby squeezed Sam's shoulder as he moved out of the room and with a nod was gone.

Dean took the chair he was moving and placed it at the table so that he was between Sam and Clara.

"So Sammy, I'm gonna stay right here while you have a nice chat with Clara, okay?"

Sam nodded, his hair hiding his eyes. His shoulders were still slumped and he stared at his hands that were now in his lap.

Clara knew her first order of business was to get Sam more comfortable with her. "So Sam, do you have any questions for me?"

Sam's head slowly shot up and he gave her a bit of eye contact under his bangs. "So you're a doctor, and you are going to help me figure out how the demon messed up my head,and try to fix it?"

Clara smiled. "Something like that, Sam. I'm a doctor and I've gone to school to learn how to help people when life takes them down for a bit. The thing is- school never trained me for this type of work.

Dealing with the supernatural has definitely been a learning experience. I don't have all the answers and probably will never even understand a fraction of what goes on in the dark; however I would like to work with you to figure out how to fix this."

Sam sat up a little straighter and looked at Dean before speaking. "Thing is, I don't know how you can help. I feel fine, and until a few hours ago I just thought I had suffered a concussion. Dean wasn't sure how to tell me that I'm not fourteen. I see myself as a fourteen year old even when I look in the mirror. How is that possible?"

Clara gave both boys a reassuring smile before speaking. "Our brains are complicated, and it is very conceivable that this creation of separate Sams is your brains way of protecting you. You said that you don't feel like anything is wrong; are you sure you don't feel the other Sams in your head?"

Sam's face scrunched up in thought and Dean leaned over and grabbed his shoulder. "Sammy, don't force it man, either you feel it or you don't. I don't want you digging in there."

Sam let out a shaky breath and looked at Dean. "Why not?"

Clara leaned forward trying to gain Sam's attention. "Sam, if a demon messed around inside your head and your brain is trying to protect you, then Dean is right, digging around is not a good idea."

Dean gave Clara a grateful smile and released Sam's arm. "Listen to the doc, she's a smart lady."

Sam seemed to deflate and looked at Clara with worry filled eyes. "I don't feel anyone else."

Clara nodded. "That's fine Sam. I would like to talk to your other personalities but we have time. I can wait for them to pop in for a visit. In the mean time I would like to get to know you better."

Sam blew out a shaky breath. "What would you like to know? Evidently this is all past history and I'm not sure how I can be of any help."

"Well Sam, there is a reason your psyche chose this time period. I feel like if I get to know you better then I could understand why this personality made an appearance. I've gotten Dean's take on it but I want yours." Clara wished for her note book, she felt naked without it but she could tell Dean had been right, her writing everything down might have spooked this unsure version of Sam.

Sam shifted his attention to Dean and then back to Clara. "What do you want to know?"

"First off, I want you to be honest about everything you tell me, even though Dean is here. This Dean is not your eighteen year old brother; he is an adult that has been with you for years. Anything you say is not going to hurt him or make him angry. Right Dean?"

Dean shifted uncomfortably. "Right. Uh, look Sammy, I know that you and Dad didn't get along much but I want you to be truthful with Clara about him or me. I know I was a bit of a smart ass in my youth so no harm no fowl there. I just want you to get better, okay?"

Sam's eyes went a little wide and his full attention was on Dean. "I don't know why I didn't think of this before... Dean, you said Dad was on a hunt but if he knew about the demon attacking me; why isn't he here?"

Dean ran his hand through his hair. "Sam, I'd rather focus on you."

Sam started to get agitated. "Dean, where is Dad?"

Clara could tell by Dean's posture that their dad must be a touchy subject, but even so, she felt that they had to be honest with Sam or trust would never be gained. "Dean, tell you brother, I think he needs to know."

Sam gave Clara brief relieved look before turning his attention back on Dean. "Please Dean..."

Dean muttered a curse under his breath. "Dad isn't with us anymore, kiddo."

Sam's eyes filled with tears. "Nooo..."

Dean glared at Clara and then started to pull Sam into his arms, but the minute there was contact, Sam slumped forward. Clara could tell that he was no longer conscious.

Dean sighed. "Could you help me move him to the cot over there. He's heavy."

Clara was immediately taking Sam's other side. "Gosh, he is a big boy."

Dean grunted. "Yeah, he is a bit skinny but damn it with all the height it's like trying to move a damn Sasquatch around."

Clara and Dean got the young man settled and Clara quickly took his vitals and was satisfied that the loss of consciousness was caused by the mental stress and not anything else.

Dean paced beside the cot. "Is he okay?"

Clara looked up from her perch on the cot. "Yeah, I think it all got to be too much so he shut down. I've had this happen before."

Dean stopped and looked down at his brother. "Did we have to tell him about Dad?"

Clara sighed. "Deep down he knows, Dean, and if we lied I was afraid he wouldn't trust me, or you."

Dean nodded. "Why don't you go upstairs and get a bite to eat. I'll sit with my brother."

Clara gave Dean a smile. "Yeah, it never hurts to refuel. I'll bring you and Sam something down."

Dean mumbled _yeah_ as he took her place on the cot next to Sam. Clara moved quickly out of the room, giving Dean alone time with his brother.

-0-

A few minutes after the doctor had headed upstairs, Sam started to stir. Dean held his breath waiting to see which Sam he would be dealing with.

The cold eyes and smirk that greeted Dean had him getting off the cot quickly. Sam sat up and chuckled.

"The panic room is getting old, Dean. But I must say the good doctor is gonna be fun. I can't believe you got me that fine piece of ass to play with. Poor little Sammy was out of his league, but me, I know exactly what to do with her."

Dean wanted to punch the smug son-of-a -bitch, but clamped down on that anger. His brother was in there somewhere and he couldn't let his emotions get the better of him.

"You will play nice with the doctor or I will kick your ass." Dean huffed out.

Sam put his hands out in a placating manner. "Calm down Dean, don't want you having a stroke. You've always told me that sex was a stress reliever, so what about a three way with the doctor? That should relieve a lot of stress and be fun too. She has those crazy eyes you love so much."

Dean moved towards the cabinet with supplies without another thought. He had a pair of hand cuffs in hand when he returned to Sam.

"Kinky, Dean." Sam replied as Dean cuffed his left wrist to the cot. It shocked but relieved Dean when Sam didn't put up a fight.

"You're going to sit there and answer Clara's questions, do you understand me?" Dean spat out.

"Sure thing. Not like I have much else to do. Little Sammy is hiding away not wanting to deal with losing Daddy, and well, maybe the other Sam could come out and play later. Would you like that Dean? That Sam didn't always listen but he still looked up to his big brother, and hell, he might have the courage to nail Clara."

"You will not speak to her that way." Dean was ready to flee the room and his brother when a voice from behind had him stopping in his tracks.

"Oh Dean, don't worry about me. I've dealt with sex addicts that talked a hell of a lot dirtier to me than that. I'm a big girl, I can take it." Clara held a tray of food and carried it over to the table in the room.

Sam waggled an eyebrow. "Oh, I bet you can take it hard doc."

Clara rolled her eyes at Sam and turned her attention to Dean. "So I thought I'd eat down here with you boys. I'm assuming that we have Soulless Sam in the house."

Before he could answer his brother was struggling with his cuff. "The one and only, baby. Why don't you come over here so we can get to know each other better?"

Dean grabbed one of the plates and moved towards Sam. "Here, eat up Soulless Boy Wonder."

Sam looked down at the plate and then up at Clara. "If I'm a good boy and eat it all can I have desert?"

Dean joined Clara at the table. "Shut up Sam, and eat."

Clara moved to take a bite of her sandwich and whispered to Dean. "Dean, thanks again for being my back up. I've dealt with his type before but never under these circumstances."

Dean moved to grab his own sandwich. He wasn't really hungry but he knew he needed to keep up his strength because the next few days were not going to be fun. "Yeah, well, that Sam is an ass but believe it or not he got laid a lot."

Clara gave Dean a smirk. "Oh I can believe it, he has a nice body. Some women are shallow just like men. But then, I think you are all too aware of that."

Dean about choked on his sandwich. "What are you trying to say?"

Clara leaned over and spoke in a hushed tone. "From what I have learned from Bobby, Sam always has looked up to you, so it makes sense to me that if he held you in such high regards then, as a soulless person that was at a loss as to how to behave he might model himself after you. Now before you blow a gasket, keep in mind that he might have mimicked, but without a soul he was a very over exaggerated and uncaring version of you."

Dean sat there stunned, not sure what to say. Clara had definitely struck home with her remark. He'd never thought of it that way but it made sense; but then again, maybe that was why she made the big bucks looking into peoples heads. Before he could reply, Sam ruined the moment.

"So you two talking about a threesome later? I mentioned it to Dean and he didn't seem interested, but now I'm thinking he's changed his mind."

Dean whipped his head around towards his brother's direction, ready to cut into his sibling, when Clara beat him to it.

"Please, like I would want anything to do with you. Sure, you have a body to die for; I would have to be blind not to see that, and a one night stand might have its kicks, but I prefer to have someone who is deeper than that. You could never understand or please me or take care of any of my needs, just your own. You're the Id in living color and I'm not into being abused by others. However, the Sam that's buried down deep in you, now that Sam is worth knowing, at least I have a feeling he is. I want to help you so that I can get to know the real Sam."

Sam smirked. "Yeah, well the Sam you're trying to reach is broken, and broken bad. You seem like a smart doc so I'll spell it out. Dean forced a broken soul into this body and had a wall built around it.

Then the dumb ass took his vulnerable brother out hunting and a demon cracked the wall. Now all these horrible images from Hell are flooding in and I'm the only thing holding it all in place. Get rid of me and the whole house of cards falls down and a blubbering Sam is left in my wake."

Dean was left speechless as he felt guilt and helplessness well up inside him. The words his brother had spoken cut close and hurt.

Clara wasn't at a loss for words. "Okay, I get it. I'm proud of you for coming to the front and saving Sam. However, you can't blame Dean here. You were not complete without your soul and you know it. I bet if I could talk to the real Sam he would tell me that he was grateful to Dean for pulling him out of that horror, and he would also tell me that he wanted to hunt with Dean. The real Sam is a hunter. So, we are stuck with you for now, but know this, I am determined to find away to make you whole again. The total package. You have my word on that."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Well, isn't that nice. You don't have a fucking clue and you know what? I'm sick of you, and being here with him, so … adios."

Before Dean could move Sam fell back onto the cot, knocking his plate of food to the ground. Dean and Clara both jumped up, only this time he beat her to Sam and so he was the one to take his brother's vitals, which once again were fine.

"He's just out again." Dean reported back to Clara as she cleaned the mess the upturned plate had made.

"I think I'll go and get him another plate. Dean, why don't you uncuff him and put the handcuffs away so that when he wakens, if it is a different Sam, we don't have to explain them/" Clara stood with the plate full of dirty food and headed towards the door.

Dean moved to uncuff his brother and then sat down, waiting and hoping that this time he would be able to cope with his brother, whatever version decided to show up.

TBC

A/N: So a day late posting isn't so bad, huh? Again, I got the beta'd version in time to post on Thursday but time got away from me. I'll try to do better next week. Thanks again to all that have reviewed and commented. :)


	5. Chapter 5

Outside The Wall

Chapter Five

Clara found Bobby in the kitchen. He put down the dish rag he was drying dishes with as she entered.

"Boys still hungry?" Bobby said as he took the plate from her.

"Not exactly, well, Sam dropped his food so he needs a new plate." Clara sat down and took off her shoes. She had decided they weren't made for doing stairs.

Bobby smiled at her. "My house may be a bit dusty but I bet you could get by without wearing shoes if those are bothering you. They look mighty nice on ya, but not very comfy."

Clara chuckled. "Yeah, well, you have to look sharp in my profession, and I wanted to make a good impression with you and the boys, but I think I might go and change clothes before I take the plate back down."

Bobby paused at the counter where he was making Sam a new sandwich. "Well, your stuff is upstairs in the guest room, first room on the right. There's a bathroom up there on the same side right next to your room. Go ahead and get freshened up and I can take the plate back down."

"That would be great, thanks. I'm thinking jeans and a t-shirt will be less distracting to Sam anyway. Maybe he'll lay off on the flirting." Clara said with a sigh.

"What? I can't... wait a minute. Did Sam change personalities down there?" Bobby's voice held a bit of anger to it.

"Yeah, the smart ass non-soul version of Sam made an appearance but I made him angry and he's left the building or at least I think he did. I'm hoping that I can meet the third personality so that I can ponder over his case tonight." Clara slipped her shoes back on and stood up.

When she did, she could see the veins in Bobby's neck standing on end like he was really upset. In fact his coloring had gone almost red.

"Bobby is there something I need to know about Sam? You seem upset."

Bobby deflated a bit. "Let's just say me and the version of Sam you just spent time with didn't get along."

Clara nodded. "I can understand that. If you'd rather me take the meal down I can."

Bobby gave her a small smile. "Nah, we all have to face our demons from time to time. I can deal."

Clara moved to leave. "Well if it's any consolation to you, I don't think that Sam will be around. I can't promise but I'm think he's gone at least for now."

"I'll take what I can get. If you need anything just let me know." Bobby replied.

Clara laughed. "Don't let Dean eat my lunch?"

Bobby chuckled. "Consider it done."

-0-

Dean found himself staring at Sam, half willing him to wake up and half wishing him to stay asleep. As Sam began to stir, Dean found himself wanting to flee but mentally berated himself for the thought.

Sam's eyes opened slowly. A sluggish voice spoke, "D-Dean?"

Dean laid a comforting hand on Sam's chest. "Take it easy, Sam."

Sam let out a long breath and looked around. Dean could see confusion written all over his face.

"Where are we, Dean?" Sam stammered out.

Dean held Sam in place, not wanting the kid to panic. "What do you remember, Sam?"

Sam brought a hand up to his face and moved his hair from his eyes. "Uh, we were going to take a break after the shape shifter in St. Louis, both of us were pretty beat up, but we're not in a motel room Dean, where are we?"

This time Sam made a move to sit up and Dean helped him. He watched as Sam's geeky brain cataloged everything in the room.

"We're in Bobby's basement. He, uh, built a hunter's version of a panic room down here. Pretty cool, huh?"

Sam took a deep breath and slowly released it. "Okay, so we're here because..."

Dean placed a comforting hand on his brother's thigh. "Sam, it's very complicated but it has to do with being safe from demons. I'll explain it all, just let me ..."

Dean stopped in mid-sentence as Bobby entered the room with a plate for Sam. "Sam, got some lunch for you. Why don't you and Dean come and sit down and we can try and answer all your questions together, okay Sam?"

Sam nodded and got up to follow Bobby to the table. Dean took the seat he had occupied before and Bobby sat down in front of Clara's lunch. Once Sam was settled, Bobby handed him his lunch with a newspaper.

Sam took the paper and gave Bobby a questioning look. "Kid, I want you to look at the date on the paper. It's today's paper. It might come as a bit of surprise."

Sam unfolded the paper and looked. Dean held still waiting for his brother to react. Sam seemed to pale before his eyes as he let the paper slide down to the table.

"Was I in a coma? What happened?" Sam's words were rushed and unsure.

Bobby nodded at Dean. "Your brother here can tell you what happened. I'll leave you two to it, but if you need anything just holler."

Bobby paused in front of a silent Sam. "Sam, this will all work out okay, just wait and see."

The elder hunter gave Dean a nod and he was gone. Dean hated to see Bobby go, he wanted to lean on him but he knew this was his job, Sam was his brother.

"Sammy, I'm gonna spell this out as best I can, just be patient with me, okay?" Dean could see the confusion and unease on his brother's face. It was hard to see Sam this way.

"Okay, Dean." Sam replied softly.

"So, you and me, we've been hunting for awhile now. A lot of stuff has happened, and it would take quite awhile to explain it all, so I'm gonna give you the abbreviated version. We were on a hunt and a demon, she touched your head and some how it scramble your mind. She made you face some really bad shit that had gone down, stuff that was buried pretty good in that thick skull of yours and as a result..." Dean paused, hating to go on as he watched his brother stare at him, eyes full of unshed tears.

Sam swiped at the moisture collecting in his eyes and spoke. "What happened, Dean?"

"You developed multiple personalities to cope." Dean just blurted it out and waited for the questions.

Sam seemed shocked and his face scrunched up as he sat in silence for a bit. "Kind of like Sybil? How many personalities are we talking about Dean, and how long has this been going on?"

Dean sighed in relief at how calmly Sam was taking the news. He had gone into geeky information collecting mode instead of falling apart and that was a lot easier for Dean to deal with.

"You have three personalities, and this is only the second time this version of you has come out to play. It has been almost a week now."

Sam placed his hands behind his head and stretched a bit before turning his attention back to Dean.

"So what are the other personalities? In Sybil they varied widely. If I remember right she had a dozen and some of them were men. I'm not becoming a female version of myself am I?" Sam's face contorted in disgust at that statement.

Dean had to laugh, it was so Sam to act like this and he missed Sam. This Sam. "No, thank God no. I might call you Samantha sometimes but the idea of dealing with you as a bitchy female, now that is down right scary. No, there's a teenage version of yourself. A fourteen year old you to be more precise, and then this stupid bad ass hunter version that has all your wildness without any of your geeky charm. I hate dealing with him."

Sam gave him a puzzled look. "That bad, huh?"

"Yep, but now at least I can remind myself it could be worse; I could be stuck with Samantha."

Sam rolled his eyes and sighed. "So what are you and Bobby doing about this other than hiding me in a basement? And is there a reason that I'm in the basement?"

Dean gave him a reassuring smile. "Well in your current state you are a bit vulnerable and to be honest, I don't trust Robo Sam."

Sam's eyes went wide. "R-Robo Sam? That bad?"

Dean nodded. "Afraid so, but don't worry about it, Sam. It's a side of you with no remorse, just sense of mission, but Bobby and I can handle your jerky self. As for what we are doing? Well Bobby has been glued to his books and made lots of calls but hasn't found anything yet. We have some feelers out there trying to figure it all out. In the meantime, Bobby found a shrink that has dealt with, and understands supernaturally induced ..."

Dean stopped. He'd almost said mental illness and that was not a label he wanted to give Sam, but it was too late; the kid had put two and two together.

"Crazy? She deals with hunters who have lost it. Is that what you're telling me?" Sam shifted a bit in his chair in agitation.

Before Dean could reply, a female voice spoke up from the doorway. "Sam, I'm not here to diagnose you as a crazy person and lock you up. I'm here to figure out what happened and fix it just like you two do on the jobs you go on."

Sam froze as he took in Clara, who was entering the room. Dean found himself doing the same. The good doctor had changed into some snug fitting jeans with a low cut navy t-shirt tucked into her pants.

She was now wearing running shoes and her hair was down. Dean decided she looked hotter now than before, and that was saying something.

Dean found his voice first. "You changed clothes."

Clara smiled at him. "Well I decided I might as well be comfortable. Those heels kill my feet when I have to do a lot of stairs. You don't mind do you, Dean?"

"No, I don't mind at all. Hey Sam, this is Clara, the doctor I was telling you about." Dean choked out as Clara approached Sam with her hand out.

Dean could tell that Sam was appreciating the sight in front of him as well by the nervous movement his hands were making over his thighs. It was like he was ironing out invisible wrinkles, a very nervous Sam-like habit.

Sam slowly took the hand offered to him and gave a tentative smile. "I'm Sam, but then you probably already know that."

Clara squeezed Sam's hand and then took her seat in front of her food. "That's true Sam, but I think this version is new, and a refreshing change from the more recent Sam I met."

Sam ducked his head. "I'm sorry."

"Hey, no need for that Sam. I don't know about you two but I'm starved. How about we eat our lunch and then we can talk about, well, about anything you boys want to talk about?"

Dean really needed a drink more than food at the moment but he took the respite the meal gave them. After taking the first bite he realized just how hungry he had been. It was too bad that Robo Sam hadn't stuck around for lunch though, because this Sam was picking at his food.

-0-

Clara could feel Sam's eyes on her as she ate. He hid behind his hair and tried to be discreet but she could feel it. Dean seemed to be watching his brother and Clara, well, she kept an eye on both boys.

Sam was picking at his food and Dean was devouring his. She made a note of that in her head. Dean evidently found comfort in food where Sam did not.

They had sat in silence and Clara realized that she would have to be the first to break the ice.

"So Sam, you're not hungry?"

Sam sighed and pushed his plate away from him. "Not really, could we just get on with this?"

"Sure, so do you have questions for me?" Clara asked as she pushed her plate out of the way.

"Isn't that your job? Have me lie on a couch, and ask questions?" Sam replied with annoyance.

Dean shifted in his seat. "Sammy, I know this is frustrating but give Clara a chance."

Sam gave Dean an annoyed glance. "It's Sam. He then turned his attention to Clara. I'm sorry, this is a lot to take."

Clara gave him a sympathetic smile. "Don't sweat it Sam, it is new territory for all of us."

Sam frowned. "You've never dealt with multi-personalities before?"

"I've read case studies but never directly, and this is definitely the first supernaturally caused case I've come across." Clara answered truthfully.

Sam huffed. "Then how are you going to help me?"

Clara took a deep breath and blew it out. A lot was riding on what she said next, she could tell by both brothers' tense positions; they needed a valid answer, and now.

"Here is the thing, I can't promise anything, Sam, just like your friend Bobby can't promise you an answer but is working on a way to help you using his resources. Both of us are going to do are darnedest with our bag of tricks to find a way. It might end up that I need to combine my help with his but we will find a way. I'm not one to give up easily." Clara could see Sam relaxing a bit but Dean seemed to be just as tense.

Dean shifted closer to his brother when he spoke. "As long as you understand that if anything you do makes Sam uncomfortable, you stop, no questions asked. He isn't some case study to be made an example of."

Clara nodded. "Of course Dean, I can guarantee I went into this type of work to help people, not to make the big bucks. So Sam, questions?"

Sam looked at his hands and then back up at Clara. "Do you even have a plan as to how you might help me?"

"Well, I wanted to meet all three of your personalities today and I did that. In the next day or so, I hope to interview each part of you and find out why you chose them to help protect you from the bad memories that are threatening to overtake you. I would like to get Dean and Bobby's input on this too if that is okay with you, Sam?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, if it'll help you can talk to them about me and what has happened. To be honest, right now, they both have a better picture of what is going on than I do. So once you have the information you want, what do you plan to do?"

Clara blew out a frustrated breath. "If this was a text book case of multi-personalities I would work on integrating the three into one. I think if I can find out why your mind chose these three personalities I might be able to do just that."

Sam's eyes went a bit wide. "How could you do that, and why? I mean, if my mind split because it couldn't process things then what makes you think it can now?"

Dean reached over and placed a hand on his brother's shoulder and squeezed. "Sam, just calm down man and listen to what she has to say."

Clara gave Dean a grateful smile. "Sam, as to how I could integrate the personalities, we normally use things like hypnosis to accomplish that. In the past it has allowed doctors to talk to all of the personalities at once. Once I have the three talking to each other, then we work together not only to join them but to come up with strategies that will allow you to deal with the memories that are bothering you. My goal is to give you a way to face this as a whole person. I can't guarantee success, in fact I might not be able to bring you together, but I want to try."

"Okay, I guess this is all I got anyway or Dean wouldn't have let you near me." Sam smirked at his brother.

Dean removed his hand and knocked shoulders. "I just don't want a Samantha to make an appearance, you're bitchy enough without a female personality."

Clara smiled at both boys. "Well Dean, would it be okay if I spent a few minutes alone with Sam?"

Dean glared at her but she returned it and finally he relaxed a bit. "Fine, twenty minutes. Sammy, be good for the doctor and I'll bring you a lollipop back."

Sam reached out and slapped his brother's arm as he stood up. "Jerk."

"Ow, you little bitch, no lollipop for you." Dean gave the doctor a wink and left the room.

Sam smiled nervously at Clara. "Can I ask another question?"

Clara nodded. "Of course, Sam."

"Is there a reason they have me locked up? Did I do something bad? Dean has always been protective of me but I'm getting a weird vibe."

Clara paused and gathered her thoughts. "To be honest, Sam? I'm not real sure of the reasons and you really should ask Dean but... from what I've seen of uh, the less compassionate side of you... Dean and Bobby don't trust him."

Sam sighed and scratched the back of his neck. "Thanks for being honest. I got the feeling that they are hiding something from me."

Clara reached across and took Sam's hand in hers and squeezed before withdrawing it. "Well, there is a bad memory in that head of yours that you are hiding from. If they just told you straight out what it was... well I'm afraid we don't know what would happen. Let's move towards building you back up and then let all the truth come out, okay?"

Sam wiped at his jeans and nodded. "Yeah, I guess that makes sense. It's hard to know they're holding something back but I get it."

"So, a few quick questions before Dean comes back. Why do you think your mind picked this time period, this Sam, as one of it's protections, well, other than this you isn't aware of the bad memories that threatened you in the first place."

Sam's brow knitted up in thought before he responded. "I- I uh, I'm not real sure. I do know that things have not been good … and I had to face them so maybe I felt I showed strength during this time in my life?"

Clara gave Sam a sympathetic smile before she spoke. "I was told about your girlfriend. You were at college and she was killed?"

Sam winced at the statement. "Yeah, Jess, she was my normal and I should have known better than to believe that I could have that. But rather than focus on the grief, I've been using all that anger and hurt to fuel the search for what killed her, and our mom. I guess in some ways I've channeled my father, but the thing is, he hasn't been … well he has been AWOL. All I have is Dean."

"I think you're right, Sam. This was an awful time period from your life and you were able to deal with it and move on without it crippling you."

"I sometimes think that it is all gonna catch up with me and either burn me up with the anger and hate or I'll lose myself in the fear and grief."

Clara could see that Sam was beginning to become overwhelmed with all of it and decided to cut things short. She could get details out of Dean or Bobby later.

"It's okay Sam, really. I really makes me think that your mind remembers this as a time of personal strength and that is really what I was looking for. I'm sorry for bringing up bad memories but hopefully by getting things into the open, we can help you."

"Yeah, I hope so. I know that Dean wants me to stay down here, but I really would like to take a shower, do you think that's possible?" Sam looked miserable and Clara couldn't deny him that simple request.

"Certainly, why don't you follow me upstairs?"

Clara watched as Sam stood up and it hit her again, just how tall and massive this tender hearted man was. She just hoped this Sam stayed with her as they headed upstairs.

-0-

Dean was a bit shocked to see his brother coming up the stairs with Clara and he gave her a glare that she rolled her eyes to. He was going to have to work on looking intimidating to Clara because as it was, she had his number,and not in a good way.

"Sammy, what's up?" Dean asked as he moved towards the stairs.

Sam sighed. "I get that you have me in the basement for a reason but is there a reason why I can't come upstairs and take a quick shower?"

Dean could see his brother was worn thin and the last thing he wanted to do was push him over the edge. "Sure Sam, your duffel bag is still in the car, I'll bring it to you."

"I could get it." Sam replied tightly.

"You could, but see, there are demons out there gunning for you, and I want you in here where it's safe, please don't argue with me, Sam." Dean hated to be so blunt with Sam.

Sam seemed to deflate. "Yeah, whatever, I'll wait over here on the couch, if that is okay with you Dean?"

Dean shook his head. "I'll be right back."

One of the reasons that Dean didn't want Sam retrieving his bag, was that he wanted to remove anything from it that might set Sam off. He made sure it only had bathroom necessities and clothes before returning inside and handing the bag off to his brother.

Sam took it without comment and headed upstairs. Clara watched the whole exchange from a corner in the living room.

"Dean, was that necessary?"

Dean stiffened, growling at the good doc, who was now getting on his ever loving nerves.

"Oh, I don't know? Uh, maybe I should risk him going outside and becoming asshole Sam and let him steal my car, or better yet, let a demon get the jump on him!"

Clara made her way to the couch and patted the seat next to her for Dean to join her. "I'm sorry Dean, I didn't mean to second guess you, but Sam has to feel like a prisoner here."

Dean reluctantly sat down and sighed. "I know, and I feel horrible about it, but I'm just trying to keep him safe."

"Well, I would suggest that you need to re-enforce Sam with the knowledge that you trust him, but you need to have him downstairs for safety reasons. I'm not sure how well he'll take it but be patient with him."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Yeah well, I don't think it will work but I'll try. So, now you have me all alone do you want to ask me a few questions about Sam?"

Clara stretched and Dean tried to keep his eyes averted from the mid-drift that was exposed with the movement.

"Well, I would like to call it a day but I think I should take advantage of having you alone."

"Sounds dirty, I like it."

Clara playfully rolled her eyes. "In another time and place maybe, but for now would you mind joining me in the other room where I left my bag; I want to take notes."

Dean stood and offered his hand to her to help her stand. "I'm all yours."

TBC

A/N: I am so sorry to be so late with this update. I had a sick kid and then I got sick so the last few weeks have not been great. I hope to get back to my normal posting times, so look for another chapter on Thursday or Friday. Thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

Outside The Wall

Chapter Six

Bobby was bone tired and, so, after he gobbled his sandwich down he decided to take a quick nap upstairs, but that had been a bust. Too many things were go around in his head, so he just laid in bed and tried to at least organize his thoughts.

While lying there, he had heard someone go into the bathroom and start a shower. By the heavy sounds of the footfall, he had immediately known it was Sam, and for a split second he was uneasy. The thought of being caught upstairs with Sam wearing that smirk was not something he could handle right now but he quickly calmed himself with the knowledge that Dean would let 'that Sam' upstairs.

Part of Bobby still wanted to bolt but he clamped down on that feeling and focused on his thoughts.

They had Clara here to help but this was a supernatural problem. Bobby knew that he needed to keep searching for a 'cure' for Sam – some way to plug the crack. A Latin spell mixed with a potion was gonna be hard to overcome.

He had already gone through all his witch spell books once and called a few contacts but had come up with Zip, Nada. In the end, he would just have to double check and hope for the best. Maybe, just maybe, Clara would come through. It was a slim chance, but all they had at the moment.

Bobby stopped his pondering as the water turned off in the shower and he listened as Sam moved to the guest room that normally housed the boys. Right now, it contained Clara's things but Bobby could understand Sam wanting a bigger room to dress in rather than the tiny bathroom. Kid was a big guy.

He waited a few minutes but Sam didn't move. Bobby hated the idea of spying on the younger Winchester, but in his current state, it wouldn't do for him not to check on Sam. He had an idea that Dean would be up shortly anyway to do the same.

Taking a deep breath as he sat up, Bobby placed his ball cap back on his head and moved stiffly towards the guest room. The door was wide open and Sam was perched on the edge of one of the twin beds, his head in his hands. The young hunter flinched a bit as Bobby entered but didn't move.

Bobby moved to sit on the twin bed closer to the door next to Sam. He sat there in silence for a bit waiting for Sam to acknowledge him. After a tense moment Sam finally moved his hands down to his thighs and looked over at Bobby.

There was such pain and sadness there that it broke Bobby's heart.

"Bobby, I know I need to go back downstairs but I just needed a moment..."

"It's fine Sam, really, take all the time that you need. Wanna be alone for a bit?" Bobby moved to get up but Sam shook his head no.

"Could you and I talk just … I want to understand things better but it is all just so much to take."

Bobby gave Sam a small smile and sat back down. He wasn't sure he was the right person to sooth Sam at the moment but he couldn't turn the kid down.

"We can talk or I can listen. I know that you've always been one that liked to have the facts all laid out and I'm sorry that we can't quite do that right now but I'll answer anything I can."

Sam gave him a watery smile and nodded. "So, it hit me when I opened my bag and saw clothes that I've never seen before...and then I really looked myself in the mirror and I've changed a lot. It made this all really real to me. My head is stuck at age twenty two but I'm not that guy anymore."

Bobby let out a heavy sigh. "But the thing is, you are still Sam. This period of time you're reliving was hell but you made it through and it made you a stronger person. Unfortunately, every dedicated hunter has a moment in time that makes them who they are- at least hunting wise. You were never truly engaged in this lifestyle until you lost your girlfriend. For me it was losing my wife so I get it Sam, I really do, and it sucks but I think the fact that you survived it and moved on... well your gonna need that strength to face head on your new issues."

Sam's eyes had lit up when Bobby mentioned his dead wife. It didn't surprise him when Sam called him on it. "You lost your wife to the supernatural?"

Bobby gave him a tight nod. "Yeah, she was possessed by a demon and I had to kill her. If I'd known then what I know now I might have been able to save her. It's the thought of at least being able to save others that drives me now and helps me honor her memory."

Sam swallowed hard. "I'm sorry Bobby. I feel the same way, if I could find Jess's killer and save people then maybe I can atone a bit for what happened to her. Thing is, I know that my life has moved on and I fear what has happened. I'm afraid to face what I have become especially when everyone keeps mentioning this conscious-less version of me."

Bobby took his cap off and scratched his nervous itch before replacing it. "I ain't gonna lie to you, it has been a hell of a time literally but I want you to know one thing, that version of yourself that Dean and I wanna keep an eye on, he's not your fault. Something horrible was done to you, and he was a result of that. I'm sorry if Dean and I seem spooked about it but I guess the best way to imagine it is..."

"Like a shape-shifter? Because I know having to face one wearing Dean's face was hard and I'd be lying if I didn't say that for the rest of that day I was weary every time my Dean moved. I knew it wasn't Dean that attacked me, but I still had these horrible memories associated with his face."

Bobby felt ashamed for a moment. He'd forgotten the tale of how a shape-shifter wearing Dean's face had tried to kill Sam. Sam hadn't thought twice about moving on but Bobby knowing that Sam hadn't had any control over Soulless Sam had held onto that fear.

Bobby swallowed hard to keep his emotions at bay. "Kid, see that's why you're drawing from this time period, you were able to face so much and I know we're gonna find a way to get you through this. That is a promise and when we do, I'm gonna owe you one hell of an apology."

Sam gave him a puzzled look. "I'm sure we're good Bobby, but I guess I need to head downstairs before Dean comes looking."

"Sure you're ready to? We can stay up here if you need to."

Sam smiled. "Nah, I'm tired of hiding. Let's try and kick this in the butt."

"Sounds like a plan."

-0-

Dean had followed Clara into the office area and planted himself at Bobby's desk while the doctor took her chair across from it. He watched as she dug in her bag and pulled out her note pad and pen. Dean had had an itch to get himself a shot of whiskey while she retrieved her things but fought it off. It wouldn't do him any good to make Clara feel he was an alcoholic; no he'd catch a drink later when she wasn't around.

Clara smiled at Dean. "So, I do have a few questions for you Dean. This crack in Sam's so called wall, is it unstable and a big one? Not that I'm even sure what I'm asking here but I guess it's good to have as many facts as you can."

Dean frowned and paused over how much information to give Clara. He wanted to help her out but to explain how an angel had checked Sam over... well he didn't really want to go there so he decided to keep the explanation simple.

"We have this friend that is kind of an expert in this sort of thing, and he said that it was just a crack. He felt it was just big enough to cause Sam duress but a crack made the wall unstable so he was worried that another demon attack could cause the whole wall to crumble."

Clara nodded and made a note. "Okay, so I can try and help him deal with the memories that have seeped out. I don't know enough about the supernatural to help protect Sam from demons but my dad deals in protective items, maybe there is a charm or something that could keep a demon from touching Sam's wall? It could guarantee his safety of a collapse and then I can focus on helping him deal with the memories that are attacking him at the moment."

Dean's face lit up, he and Bobby had been so set on reversing the spell and fixing the hole that they hadn't considered just protecting Sam from further invasion other than locking him away. A protective ward or charm could help them immensely.

"I like how you think, Doc. I'll get Bobby on finding a charm or ward. So, any other questions?"

Clara smiled brightly. "I'm glad that a charm might be of help. I do have another question for you.

I'm going to ask each of Sam's persona's this, why would Sam chose them? What made him reach out to those versions of himself?"

"Well, the Soulless Sam is obvious. He did what was best for Sam and didn't bother with being taken down by emotions. Soulless Sam can keep the emotions at bay but knowing my Sam he isn't comfortable with this version. In fact, I think part of Sam is struggling to keep this version from being the dominate one. The other two is a bit harder to say, but Sam at fourteen knew about hunting and by this time started bucking it. He actually went toe to toe with Dad and I would have never dreamed of doing that. Plus for a kid that age to be able to take stand up for himself and kill werewolves made him pretty tough. So, I guess he felt strong at that age." Dean paused for a moment remembering just how strong Sam was but still in the need of his and Dad's approval.

Clara seemed to read his mind with the next question.

"So no weaknesses even at fourteen?"

Dean sighed. "The Sammy wanted to be a part of our family but I don't think he felt like he fit in. Thing was, even though he was a bit insecure about some things during this time period, he did know I had his back."

Clara nodded. "Bobby had said you two were very close. Even in childhood?"

Dean bristled a bit with the question. He didn't feel right sharing his childhood memories with Clara and didn't want to be judged but if this was going to help Sam then he'd do it.

"Dad because of hunting was gone a lot. For a majority of our childhood it was just me and Sam so yeah, I'd say we were very close."

"My daddy was the same way so I get it. It's the nature of the game but I had my mom where you two evidently did not. Makes sense you'd be close." Clara answered with a soothing tone.

Not feeling as judged allowed Dean to share a bit more. "Our mom was killed when Sam was a baby by a demon and that is why Dad became a hunter. So is that enough childhood background?"

Clara hummed approval as she wrote on her pad. "Yes, really for now I was just interested in the time periods each Sam represents which brings us to the one he is currently displaying. So same question, why this Sam?"

"Well, this Sam was dragged back into hunting when the same demon that killed our mom, killed his girlfriend. He was on a mission to kill the demon before it hurt our family again. It was a horrible time but Sam didn't fall apart. He definitely showed a lot of strength during this time period. And when things got too much, he had me to back him up."

Clara looked up from her notes. "Dean I think when we do try and bring these Sam's together, I'm gonna need you to be positive about it. You're his support system so with the knowledge that you feel he is strong enough to face this, he will find strength in that. He evidently has a lot of faith in you."

Dean swallowed hard. "Yeah well, I can't promise until I'm sure this is the right thing to do but yeah, if the time comes I'll have his back."

Clara gave him a sympathetic smile. "I know this is tough but we'll figure it out. Now, I do have one final question. Which of the three Sam's is most like the Sam I would have met last week before all this happened?"

Dean blew out a breath. "That is a hard one. He is so much more than what you have seen. I would say the current Sam is most like him but minus the anger, Sam has learned to deal better with his anger.

He can still be all excited like his fourteen year old self over certain books and if you were a demon, you see the Soulless Sam come out just before he crushed you."

Clara closed her note pad. "Then we just need to bring them back together."

Dean was distracted from answering by the sounds of footsteps on the stairs. Dean got up and met his brother and Bobby at the bottom of the stairs.

"Feel better after the shower, Sam?"

Sam smiled. "That and a good talk with Bobby. So, uh Clara could we talk for a minute?"

Clara moved up from behind Dean and motioned towards the office but Sam shook his head.

"I think we'd do better to be downstairs."

Before Dean could say anything his brother and Clara were making their way to the panic room.

"Bobby, what's up with Sam?"

Bobby smiled. "He's ready to fight this thing."

-0-

Sam settled at the table downstairs and motioned for Clara to join him.

"So Doc, did you and Dean figure anything out while I was showering?"

Clara nodded as she took her seat. "We decided that Bobby should look for some sort of charm or ward to protect you from any further demon brain invasion."

Sam quirked and eyebrow, he'd be been so caught up in what was wrong with him that he hadn't thought about having a defensive move.

"That sounds smart. As for my current mental state, did you make any plans?" Sam tried to keep his focus; he was tired of letting emotions rule him. Letting his fear take over was not going to help him in the least.

"Well, I need to find away to get you and the other Sam's together. One way would be hypnosis. How do you feel about that idea?" Clara was giving him a close off look one that left the ball in his court.

"I don't know. If you think it might help, I'd be willing to try it." Sam replied with as much confidence as he could.

"Good, because I think it's time for the three of you to meet and work out a way to become one." Clara said matter- of- factly.

"Is Dean okay with it?" Sam asked tentatively.

"I think if you want to do it, he will be supportive. I won't lie, I'm not sure how it will work but it's the strongest weapon I have in my arsenal."

"Sounds like a plan, so when?" Sam asked nervously.

"Well, I'd like to have tonight to plan, so I'm thinking tomorrow morning?" Clara paused waiting for Sam to respond.

"I'd like to do it now and get it over with but yeah, you need to plan and I need to convince Dean so that should give us time to do that."

Clara reached over and took Sam's hand. "We will find away to fix this Sam. I promise."

Sam squeezed her hand and smiled. "I'm gonna hold you to that."

TBC

A/N: I'm so sorry again for posting so late- we just thought our family was done with illness. As a mom, I will caution everyone out there to really wash hands because strep and a nasty stomach bug is going around at least here in Kansas already. I have one chapter to go and hope to have it up soon. Thanks so much for reading and your patience.


	7. Chapter 7

Outside The Wall

Chapter Seven

Dean was told by Clara when she came upstairs that Sam wanted to speak to him. Dean left Bobby to research charms that could protect Sam and went to join his brother.

Dean found Sam sitting at the table in the middle of the room. He looked lost in thought until Dean cleared his throat. Sam looked up and gave him a small smile.

"Hey Dean." Sam pushed the chair out across from him with his foot.

"Hey yourself. So, uh, Clara said you wanted to talk?" Dean took a seat and waited for Sam to respond.

Sam shifted in his seat nervously. "Well, I was talking with Clara, and she had an idea of a way to bring all of me back together again. Geesh, that just sounds weird."

Dean broke a smile. "Yeah, well, you always were weird."

Sam lightly kicked Dean. "You always know the perfect thing to say. Jerk."

"Yeah, and you always act like a bitch, but hey, I wouldn't expect anything less. So, what's the plan here Sam?"

Sam sat up straight but looked at the table and not Dean. "Hypnosis."

The word was mumbled and Dean wasn't sure he heard right. "Say again, Sam?"

Sam looked up and swallowed hard. "Hypnosis was the suggestion."

Dean sighed and nodded. "So, what do you think?"

Sam shrugged. "Thing is, I have no clue how to help myself. Clara said this is the strongest idea she has, so I'm thinking it wouldn't hurt to try, right?"

Dean felt his brother's intense stare. He knew the kid was looking to him for guidance. It sucked not knowing what to do, but they had to do something. Hypnosis shouldn't be harmful. It had worked with Anna, but then, this was his brother. Dean hated taking chances when it came to Sam.

"I'll be honest Sam; I'm coming up with zero ideas myself on how to solve this. Hypnosis sounds like a possibility and if you think you wanna try it, then I'll have your back." Dean gave his brother small smile and waited.

Sam pushed out a long breath before replying. "Truthfully? I just want this all to be over. I feel like an intruder in my own skin. I've aged and I don't remember it, my clothes are different- you're different. So yeah, I think we need to do this."

Dean scratched the back of his head nervously. "Yeah, I get it has to be weird, it's weird for me too. I know that Bobby is looking into a charm to protect you from demon brain invasion, which is another weird thing to say, and well, I guess we'll get ready for a hypnosis session, huh?"

Sam thrummed his hands against the table before answering. "Yeah, Clara said something about tomorrow morning. She wanted time to prepare. Hey, Dean, can I ask you about something I've noticed?"

Dean scrunched his brow up. "Sure, shoot."

Sam moved his hand over his chest in a nervous gesture. "The tattoo?"

Dean chuckled and pulled on his shirt so that his matching tattoo was showing. "We both got them for protection against possession."

Sam nodded and his face scrunched up in thought. "So, it works better than a charm because it can't be easily removed, huh?"

"Yep."

"So maybe I need a tattoo against demon's getting into my head."

Dean snorted. "You just want another cool tattoo."

Sam huffed. "Yeah that's me, Mr. Tattoo."

"You've got a pain kink, just admit it, Sammy Boy," Dean retorted as he made a move to stand.

"You're the one who thinks scars attract the babes, so you're the one with the pain kink. Where you going?"

"That one's easy Sam, food, we need food. I'm starving and I don't think well without a full stomach. Wanna come upstairs with me to makes some dinner?" Dean could see the hesitancy in Sam's face.

"I should probably stay down here," Sam answered quietly.

"Why? Afraid the big bad Sammy might come out? I'm not, and if he does I'll kick his butt. So come on Sam, let's see if Bobby has anything edible upstairs."

Sam gave him a small smile and reluctantly followed his brother up the stairs.

-0-

Sam decided if Dean was willing to take the risk that he might change personalities upstairs then it must not be a big risk. He had followed his brother into the kitchen, and between the two of them they had found supplies to make a quick dinner of tacos. There were no tomatoes or lettuce, which disappointed Sam a bit, but Dean was more than happy with meat and cheese tacos.

It was nice to have the easy banter with his brother and to stop thinking about all the crap that was going on with them. Sam was content to brown meat in a skillet while Dean popped beer caps off his head. It was normal, well, as normal as the Winchesters got.

As they got closer to having dinner ready, Dean went to tell Clara and Bobby. Sam set the table and then hovered, waiting for the others to join him.

Once they were seated, a silence fell over the room as the food was consumed. Bobby was the first to break that silence about half way through the meal.

"So Sam, we found a charm that should protect you. Clara's dad had one on hand and is over-nighting it. We should have it in forty eight hours."

Sam gave both Bobby and Clara a grateful smile. "I appreciate it. Thanks."

Dean cleared his throat and swallowed a large lump of food down with swig of beer. Once done, he smiled at his 'audience' and spoke. "Sammy wants it tattooed on, if possible like, we did with the protection symbols. Bobby, what do you think?"

Bobby scratched at his beard. "Probably. It isn't a super complicated symbol. I'll give Donnie a call tomorrow and fax him the symbol, see if he can do it. Do you want him to come over or do you want to hit his shop?"

Dean looked at Sam. "What do you think kiddo? Last time he came here, but if you feel more comfortable at his shop we can do that."

Sam sighed. "Could we wait and decide after the hypnosis tomorrow? If it doesn't work then maybe a tattoo might not be a good idea, what if I changed personalities as he was trying to put it on?"

Dean whistled. "Yeah, I don't want to deal with that. Wouldn't be pretty, especially if Soulless Sam decided he didn't want it."

Clara reached across the table and placed her hand on Sam's arm. "Even if we can't get your personalities together, maybe we could let each personality know the plan? But I agree, maybe it is best to wait and see, in the meantime you'll have the charm."

Clara patted his arm and pulled away.

Sam gave her a smile. "Yeah, sounds like a good idea."

-0-

Once dinner was done, Clara insisted on helping Bobby clean up since the boys had cooked. Dean was more than happy to get out of the hated kitchen clean up and guided his tired sibling to the back porch to share a beer. He figured the night air would do Sam good.

They sat in silence, not speaking just listening to the crickets chirp. It was a nice night and Dean hated to break the silence but he could see Sam was tense and not enjoying the night around them.

"Penny for your thoughts, Samantha?"

"Geesh Dean, you're the one sounding like a girl when you say crap like that."

Dean shoved playfully at Sam. "Yeah well, I'm not good at the whole talking about things but I can tell you have something weighing on you so... shoot."

"Dean, I've tried to just concentrate on the here and now. I'm living- at least in my head- in the past, and things are messed up. It's hard for me not to ask you things. Asking about the tattoo seemed to be a harmless question. Asking where Dad is, well that one seems really scary ground." Sam stared at his hands as he spoke and Dean could tell from his body posture that his brother had that answer already figured out.

It wouldn't take an Einstein to put together that if they weren't pulling Dad into this situation then... he wasn't around to talk too.

Dean let out a long breath before he spoke. "You sure you want the answer to that one?"

Sam turned and gave Dean a watery smile. "Yeah."

"I'm gonna give you the short version because, well, we'd be here all night and it isn't a pretty story.

Dad is dead. He traded his life and soul to the demon that killed mom, to save me from dying. That said, his soul is free from hell now, and I hope he has found peace."

Dean watched his brother take his words in and wasn't shocked at the fact that his brother was now white as a ghost. Sam nodded and swallowed hard.

"Wow, I just... I knew he had to have died but that is ..."

Dean patted Sam on the back before speaking. "I guess I should add that the demon that killed mom and Jess is dead."

Sam took in a sharp breath and Dean could see his brother was struggling to keep his emotions in check.

"That's good … but that didn't change things did it, Dean? We're still hunting."

Dean sighed. He forgot how this Sam had planned to live a normal life after the demon was dead.

"Yeah, again I'm not going to get into specifics or we'd never get any sleep, but here's the short version. If we'd killed the demon early on, then yeah, maybe we could have semi-retire, and gone back to at least hunting vamps and ghosts but we didn't kill him in time to stop his big plan. He opened a devil's gate and then we had a lot of powerful demons to deal with. To be honest Sam, and I know you don't want to hear this but... I don't think this life will every let us have normal. We've both tried and failed."

Sam looked at him sharply over the last comment. "We both tried?"

Dean winced at the question. He hadn't meant to let too much slip.

"I tried to have a girlfriend and the job. It didn't work."

Sam's featured softened in to a sympathetic smile. "Oh. Sorry to hear that. Please tell me she didn't.."

Dean shook his head. "Nah, she is okay just better off without me."

Sam gave Dean nod in understanding.

"So anymore big questions before we call it a night?" Dean asked reluctantly.

"I have tons, but like you said best to save them for when we have more time," Sam replied quietly.

"Hey, think positive Sammy, after tomorrow you'll have yourself back to normal and there will be no need for another discussion," Dean replied with confidence that he did not feel.

"Yeah, well I guess I'll head down stairs to sleep. You coming in?" Sam asked as he stood up.

"Nah, I'm going to sit out here a little longer. See ya in the morning, Sammy."

"Night, Dean," Sam replied as he entered the house.

Dean nodded and then turned his attention back to the quiet night. He needed a moment to clear his head and to prepare for the emotional roller-coaster they would be facing in the morning.

-0-

Clara was tired, but it was a good tired. She had been up most of the night preparing to work with Sam this morning. After combing through a few cases online that had dealt with multiple-personalities and hypnosis, she felt a bit more confident that things could work for Sam.

She had set up in the library. It had dim lighting and a comfortable couch for Sam to rest on. Her notes were in order and the only thing she needed now was Sam.

Clara was brought out of her musing by a nervous throat clearing in the doorway. Bobby stood there with his hands in his pockets looking like he'd rather be somewhere else.

"Hey, hate to bother you but Sam and Dean are a ball of nerves this morning, and I think I might kill them soon if we don't get this show on the road."

Clara smiled. "Yeah, I bet. Why don't you send them both in?"

"Sure thing. But, one quick question. How can I best help?"

"Well, why don't you ask Sam that question? See if he wants you here?" Clara could see that Bobby wanted to be part of this but she wasn't sure how Sam would feel.

"Yeah, good idea, thanks." Bobby replied quietly and then left the room.

-0-

Bobby found both boys out on the back porch. Dean was pacing and Sam was glaring at him.

"Boys, I got the go ahead to bring you both in. But before we do, Sam, I have a question for you."

Sam gave Bobby a quizzical look. "Shoot."

"How do you want to do this? I figure you want your brother in there but what can I do to help?"

Sam smiled. "I'd appreciate it if you could be in there too. If things start to go badly, Dean may need your help and I'd like you to be there."

Bobby nodded. As rough as things had been between them, he was thankful to be able to be there for the kid.

Dean moved towards the door. "Alright then girls, let's get this show on the road."

-0-

Dean had watched this type thing before with Anna and Pamela so he didn't really pay much mind to Clara and what she was saying. His full attention was on Sam.

To give the good doctor room to work, Dean took up space by his brother's head, at the end of the couch.

He felt like he was close enough that he could step in if needed.

Clara had given Sam a little pep talk before starting on how things would go, and some strategies for staying calm hopefully keeping Robo Sam at bay. Then she had launched into the whole trance thing.

Dean watched as Sam relaxed and fell under relatively quickly. His little brother looked peaceful as Clara's soft voice guided him. The elder Winchester watched Sam closely as Clara talked to him.

"So Sam, I'd like to take a peek inside your head. There was a wall built to keep away bad memories but has been cracked, can you see it?"

"I can see this blinding light, it burns cold though. It should be hot, but it's cold. Hurts to look at it."

"Is the blinding light all you see?"

"It's not a large light, just so bright." Sam's body tensed as he spoke.

"Can you walk towards it?" Clara asked firmly.

Dean wanted to scream, _don't walk towards the light, nothing every good comes from that_ but he remained quiet and just hoped that Sam would be strong enough to face what was coming. It couldn't be good.

"I can try." Sam replied quietly.

Clara's kept a soothing tone as she spoke. "Good, just take it slowly."

"No," Sam replied forcefully, and then he sat up.

"Sam what..." Clara started to say but was pushed away as Sam stood up.

Dean could tell immediately he was now faced with the 'other' Sam. The one he had hoped to never see before.

"You guys are so stupid," Sam said as he walked across the room and glared at the three of them.

Bobby had been in the doorway but had moved, no longer wanting to block Sam. Dean couldn't blame the man for being so cautious around this Sam. Dean stayed quiet, ready to pounce on his brother if things got out of hand.

Clara seemed to be a little more in control of her emotions when she spoke. "Tell me why we're stupid Sam."

Sam caulked an eyebrow and smiled appreciatively at the doctor. "Okay, I'll humor you doctor because you are so far out of your element here, and, well, you're hot."

"Fine, then tell me Sam." Clara huffed.

Sam moved closer, stooping in front of Clara's chair. "You see, Doc, if Sam moves towards the light he will see the memory that got out. The one that unleashed me."

Clara nodded and looked unconcerned by her personal space being invaded. She had spunk, Dean had to give her that.

"I see, so I take it you've seen what is there?" Clara replied in a professional tone.

Sam moved in a little closer and that had Dean on edge, ready to step in. "Yeah, I've seen it and it ain't pretty."

"Okay, well then I see I should have consulted you from the start. You're the one in control."

Sam's face broke into a smirk. "Bingo, the lady wins a prize. So now that you understand, then why don't we just forget the psychic mumbo jumbo and you and I can go and get to know each other better?"

Clara smiled and placed a hand on top of Sam's. It had Dean starting to second guess the doctor's sanity.

"I have an offer, Sam. Let me finish the hypnosis with the other Sam and then I will be happy to sit down and get to know you better."

Sam huffed and stood up. "You don't get it do you? If I let that Sam back in and you make him re-live that memory- well then- he will lock himself up tight in here along with little Sammy and you guys will be left with me. Can you handle me 24/7?"

Dean suppressed a shudder of fear. The thought of being stuck with Robo Sam from now on – just when he thought he was rid of him- that was unthinkable.

It made Dean finally speak up. "Doc, I think Sam has a point."

Sam laughed. "Still afraid of me Deano?"

Clara stood, getting between them before Dean could react. "Stop it."

Clara gave Dean a pleading look and then focused her attention on Sam.

"I really think that you are the one that is afraid, Sam. You're not sure that the other Sam will crumble or why else would you have stopped the hypnosis? You're the one running scared because you don't want to let go of control."

Sam glared at her. "Yeah, no, you are the crazy one here, Doc. You have no idea what lurks inside this head. It is a hell memory and Dean can tell you that those will follow you to the grave. Your precious little Sam would crumble under the weight."

"If you're so sure of that then why don't you let me finish this? If it goes the way you say, then no worries, right? You'll have your way and the rest of us will have to suck it up, but if I'm right then this is your last hurrah. Are you man enough to take that challenge?" Clara replied, full of confidence.

"Oh, I'm man enough. Baby, question is can you handle me?" Sam leered at Clara.

Dean didn't like where this was going and stepped in. "Whoa, enough of this crap."

Clara turned to Dean. "Can we talk alone for a minute?"

Dean glared at Sam and pointed. "You sit down on the couch and don't move until we get back."

Sam gave him a fake smile. "Sure thing Mr. Bossy."

Dean kept an eye on him until Sam sat down, and then moved to the doorway to speak to Bobby.

"Keep an eye on him and let us know if he tries anything." Dean growled out.

Bobby nodded tightly. "Yeah, I'll holler if he moves."

Dean then followed Clara into the kitchen. He watched as she sat down at the table and motioned for him to sit across from her. Dean reluctantly took his seat.

"So? What the hell do we do here?" Dean growled out.

Clara sighed. "Dean, we are running out of options here. The only thing I have left is medication, and somehow I don't think that it would do much good. This is the best option."

Dean wiped at his face in frustration before speaking. "Maybe, but what if it is too much for Sam?"

"That was a risk going into this Dean, your brother understood that and was willing to try. Nothing has changed except the fact that the other Sam is fighting this." Clara explained calmly.

Dean blew out a breath. "Maybe, but seems to me, if this Sam stepped up then it must be a sign that we are barking up the wrong tree."

"Or your brother is frightened, which is a normal response considering the circumstances. I can't promise you that if we do this things will be better or worse, but I do know if we don't we will be stuck at a holding pattern, and I don't think your brother would want that, Dean."

Clara paused and gave Dean a sympathetic smile. "What would Sam really want Dean?"

Dean snorted. "He'd want to be a pain in my ass and do this against my better judgment."

"I think you have your answer on what we should do, don't you?" Clara answered firmly.

"Yeah, but I don't like it." Dean answered back.

Clara smiled. "Duly noted."

"So let's do this before I change my mind again," Dean said as he stood up.

Clara nodded and followed him back to the library.

When they got back to the room Bobby was in a glaring contest with Robo Sam.

Sam's face lit up as Clara entered. "Finally, someone worth looking at."

Clara moved to the chair next to the couch where Sam was sitting, and sat down.

"So Sam, are you willing to take me up on the challenge and let me put the other Sam back under hypnosis?"

Sam gave her a crooked grin. "Sure, if you are ready to spend some quality time with me after this is over."

Clara sighed. "I'm sure getting to know you will be an eye opening experience."

"Oh baby, it will be that." Sam said as he sunk down on the couch, his long form hanging off the edges.

Dean reluctantly took the edge of the couch again and listened to Clara do her thing. He wasn't sure how she was going to get _his_ Sam to face his memories with Robo Sam in control, but he was soon rewarded with an answer.

Clara moved closer to the couch and spoke in a soft voice.

"Now that you are relaxed, can you let me talk to the other Sam? The one from this morning."

Sam took a deep breath and replied. "I'm here."

"Good, so Sam, can we go back towards the light?"

"I'd rather not," He replied, and Dean watched as a fine tremor shook his brother's body.

Clara touched Sam's arm. "Sam, remember that you're safe with us here. The memories that you might see have already happened. They can't hurt you anymore. You need to face them so we can bring you together as one solid person again. You can do this Sam, okay?"

"Okay. I'm moving towards the light now. It is so bright it makes me want to hide from it."

Dean watched as Clara took Sam's hand and squeezed.

"Sam, I'm here, and at any moment if this gets too much we'll pull you out. Dean is here too, nothing bad can happen to you now, it is all just memories... can you tell me what escaped the wall? What is it that is causing you to want to hide?"

"I'm falling, and then it's black and I feel so cold, it's so cold ... I hear Adam crying out but I can't find him... I try to reach for him but I can't find him and then it's so bright I can't really see... a blinding light and this voice. It's full of power and anger... It's not Lucifer because he spoke angrily to me ... It's Michael, and I can see his light and it's holding Adam. He telling me that I'm a fool and... and an idiot. I will pay for what I did but not Adam... Adam was a good servant, worthy of his protection. He hides Adam behind his light and shoves me into the cold and darkness. I'm so alone and it's so dark and cold and then it gets worse because I know I'm not alone, HE is there. He is laughing at me and telling me that I will now be his forever...his to play with, his to own... I'll never know anything but him, and then he takes me into this cold embrace and I can't breathe. He rocks me and soothes me but I can't move, it hurts, it's cold and his voice fills me with terror but I can't scream or breathe... make it stop, please make it stop... "

Sam was struggling for breath, and Dean moved to wake him but Clara stopped him, motioning for him to sit by Sam's side.

"Tell him he's not alone, Dean. Let him know you're here and that he can take comfort in you."

Dean took Sam's hand as Clara moved away, the whole time shushing his restless brother.

"Sammy, you're home now, he can't hurt you anymore. I'm here and I won't let him ever touch you again." Dean squeezed Sam's hand. "Feel my hand in yours, I will always keep you warm and he will never touch you again."

"He owns me Dean, all of me, he took all of me." Sam shivered and Dean took him into his arms.

"No he didn't, listen Sam, you're home and safe and I've gotcha little brother... do you hear me?"

"Not alone?"

"Not alone! Come back to me Sam, we can face this together."

Sam's eyes opened wide and he grabbed onto Dean, sobbing. Dean held tight, letting his brother cling to him, willing his strength into his brother.

Sam's whole body quaked with the sobs he let loose and Dean felt like his brother was slipping away with each one, but slowly they dissipated and he was left holding a trembling, but quiet, brother.

Once Sam calmed, Dean looked around and found they were alone in the room. He was thankful for that fact. Sam needed him now, and Dean knew he, of all people, could understand facing your demons. He could be Sam's strength.

Dean was brought out of his musings by the sound of his brother's voice.

"D'n."

It was almost a whisper but Dean heard it loud and clear and slowly started to pull away from Sam so he could get a look at his brother.

Once he was untangled from Sam he noticed that his brother's face had a calm expression on it.

"Sammy, how you holding up?" Dean asked tentatively.

Sam shrugged. "Like I ran a marathon. I'm drained, and I'm sure I'll not be sleeping anytime soon after reliving that part of hell. I'm not good, but I'm whole again. All the parts are in place."

Dean nodded. "It sucks balls, and I wish we could have avoided this."

Sam sighed. "I'm getting that damn tattoo."

"So you remember the last few days?" Dean was a little shocked that all the events over the last few days had stayed with Sam.

"Yeah, I remember, and it's weird Dean. I mean, even for us. And I'm going to have to apologize to Bobby and you all over again. I mean, fuck Dean, what an asshole that jerk off was to you guys. I get he was part of me but … I'm surprised you didn't off me."

Dean groaned. "Not this discussion again. He's not you, Sam. Well, okay, I'll concede that maybe he is the darkest corner of you. But hell, I bet the dark part of me, if it took over, it would not be pretty either. I will say, if I never see that part of you again, well, it will be too soon, but it's okay Sam. It's not your fault."

Sam gave Dean a sceptical look. "Maybe, but damn it Dean, how am I gonna face Clara?"

Dean chuckled at that. "Uh, you will face her mumbling to the floor with a bright red face. She gets it, Sam. Of all people, she gets it. She deals with crazy people all the time."

Sam glared at Dean. "So I'm crazy, huh?"

Dean nodded. "And a freak, but I wouldn't have you any other way. Dude, I'm just glad to have you and that bitch-face of yours back. So, why don't we go and face Bobby and Clara, let them know you are okay and then, have some beer."

"Cause beer makes it all better?" Sam replied with a small smile.

"Oh, and pie, we need some pie in celebration," Dean replied with shit eating grin.

Sam groaned. "Dude, pie is not the only way to celebrate. How about some cake?"

"Cake's for pussies, Sam. So get up let's go and find some pie."

Sam huffed and got up. He was a little wobbly and Dean had to support him for a moment until he got his legs back, but then he was moving under his own steam. It relieved Dean to no end to watch his brother, his whole brother, walk out of the library. It was so much better than the alternative.

Yeah, okay, maybe Sam wasn't emotionally whole. He had a lot of demons to face, but Dean had every confidence that his brother would bounce back. It might take time but it would happen and Dean would have his back until Sam could stand on his own again. Together, as a team, they would always be stronger.

End

A/N: I really want to thank my two betas, Floralia and sendintheclowns for their support and help. I appreciate everyone who took time to read this story and especially those who took time to comment.

A few of you have mentioned that you would like to see Sam meet up with Clara again and, well, I'm toying with an idea, so that might just happen. Seems to me that this season's Sam could use some of Clara's wisdom and Dean to for that matter. :)


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